♥ ♥ ♥

Homemade Tortilla Chips

2012-01-28T13:08:00.002-05:00

Check out a new entry on www.naturallygoodbycourtney.blogspot.com!

The end of the day.

2011-12-29T00:03:00.004-05:00

Merry Belated Christmas!

I'm just living the life right now. Just finished some yoga, have my cup of herbal tea and watching Friends. :)

It was my first Christmas as a Whitear! We have had so many firsts over the last year and it has been amazing. I never imagined I could find someone who accepts every little tiny thing about me -- good and bad -- and still loves me more each day. It was what I had always hoped for in a husband. He calls me beautiful even when I haven't showered and my hair is a mess and I have no makeup on. THAT is true love, my friends!

We traveled a lot this year, wedding included, and because of that, we didn't really have the finances to travel yet again for Christmas. So, we just stayed here at home in Rexburg. We didn't have money for gifts or anything either but we had each other. We put up a baby tree that sits on our dining room tabletop and we hung our stockings by the ~~chimney~~ front door with care. I hid some Reeses cups until Ryan went to sleep and put them in his stocking for Christmas morning. He made me breakfast in bed on Christmas Eve morning and also did the laundry (without me asking!!) and cleaned up around the house for me. It was so simple, but it was a wonderful Christmas. I missed my family, and he missed his, but we had each other, so it wasn't so bad. In fact, it was perfect.

The last few weeks have had some challenges (to say the least). We got our cleaning business off the ground (think: "hardest week of my life") and Ryan ran into a major bump in the road with his Spanish class (think: "um, I didn't realize that part of the course was graded....whoops"). Here is what I've realized about begin married: When you have a good marriage, it makes the sucky things suck less. The week we were cleaning was the most stressful week I have endured in a loooonnnnggggg time. By Saturday, I was emotionally holding myself together with a shaving of a toothpick. Then, the toothpick snapped and I cried and cried and cried and cried and cried and cried........

and cried.......

and cried......

But then Ryan was there the whole time. He held me. He comforted me. He consoled me. Then he let me go to Chinese food for dinner (his least favorite type of food, my most favorite type of food) and then took me to a movie and we got extra butter on the popcorn. In essence, I ate through the emotions. No, that wasn't really what happened...but you see the moral of the story. That day sucked. It sucked worse than a day has sucked in a long time; however, my husband was there to see me through it. That made it easier to deal with in the long run.

Ryan is going through some stuff with the school right now because of his Spanish grade and he might have to take a year off. This would also mean he would lose his job. I know deep down he is really stressing about this. He has shown it too. But, I know that me being there for him has helped it suck less. (I sure have used the word "suck" a lot in this post...)

I'm no marriage expert. I don't claim to be. But if I may offer advice, I will offer this: marry your best friend. Marry the man who thinks you're beautiful in your sweats and no makeup. Marry a man who thinks you're worth everything. Marry the man who will listen to you to the best of his ability and who tries to be a better man just because he thinks he doesn't deserve you (and make sure the feeling is mutual on your end). Marry someone who can make decisions without you but wants you to help and values your opinion. Marry someone who accepts you with all of your flaws. Marry someone who wants to tell you about his day and share his life with you.

I wonder if one of these days I'll stop going on and on about marriage. I imagine that will happen when I have kids and start talking about them all the time. :)

2012 is less than one week away. This year has FLOWN by. I wish you the best in your new year.

Our new years goal? We are not eating out for any meals unless it is for a birthday, anniversary or very notable special occasion.

My personal goal? To become more consistent with my yoga practice and fit into the stack of jeans under my bed that I got to fat for this year by the end of next year. I don't care about being skinny. I just want to fit in my dang clothes again!!! :)

Chaos and Eat. Pray. Love.

2011-12-21T00:34:00.000-05:00

The last five days have been CHAOS. Absolute. chaos.

I decided to start a business. Had I told you that yet? I tried it last year but it just wasn't right. I decided to give it a whirl again this year. Boy, was it hard work. I worked harder on this than I've ever worked before. It was insane.

ProClean Services is the name of our business. It's a cleaning service for apartment complexes. With 15k students and 75% of them have clean checks every two weeks and then a "white glove" at the end of each semester, it is a potentially lucrative business. Also, with new apartment complexes going up all over Rexburg, it just seemed smart. First, I tried going to some apartment communities to work directly with them but as it was almost mid semester, they all had cleaning contractors lined up. So, we had the idea to knock door to door and try to get some students signed up so we could at least get our name out there. We had almost 200 signups in three weeks!!!! I was swamped; however, the idea of turning down business wasn't in my thoughts so we just kept plugging. I was working all day, often until the wee hours of the morning, for a week before the cleaning even began. At the last minute we hired a 7th person to handle the extra business. It was all going right along!

Then one of our cleaners quit before we even began cleaning. Then another one quit in the middle of a job. So, I went to finish the job myself. The next day went okay, just incredibly busy. Then, I got a call from a manager that we could not come on Monday, but instead, had to find a way to complete all of our jobs at their community BEFORE noon the NEXT day. How was I supposed to do that!?!?!?! So, I did my best to rally up some random folks who were willing to help (paid of course) and we go most of it kind of done...not up to my expectations, but at least we tried. That pushed us all back the next day two hours and we were at crunch time. Then, we were approached by a man claiming to work for the Idaho Industrial Commission who was taking pictures of us because we "were under investigation for non-compliance". It was actually the owner of my main competitor here in town - his name is Niel...and he owns a company much like ours called Idaho White Glove. He's not a very nice man to say the least. Anywho, I was so tired and so frustrated with how the course of the last 24 hours had gone that when he showed up and started getting in my face, I pretty much lost every ounce of composure I had managed to hang on to. I was surprised I hadn't broken down before then, but boy did I break down. I cried, and cried and cried and cried. It was B-A-D. I just felt so deflated and defeated, so beat down. I was tired and so emotional. However, my wonderful husband took care of me and let me have Chinese food and took me to a movie. It was just what I needed. It took my mind off all of the ridiculousness that had just occurred and let me unwind. The next day was indeed a day of rest for me and I was so grateful for it. Yesterday and today were slow and steady and we are finally done for the semester. We have decided to give it a go at least one more semester, but we learned a lot for our next endeavor. We are grateful for our little business. It makes us both feel like we have something to call our own that we do together.

So now, my car looks like a cleaning supply room and I think I finally have the house semi back in order. It's a work in progress.

It's our first Christmas together. Tomorrow we will celebrate two months as husband and wife! I cannot believe how time has flown by. We will be together a year in just a few weeks. I am so grateful for Ryan. He is so sweet and wonderful to me. He makes me laugh more than anyone else in this whole world.

Now it's back to normal pace. Le sigh.

I am watching the movie Eat Pray Love right now and sipping on a cup of freshly brewed herbal "fruit tisane" that my Dad got me for Christmas. This movie always puts me in perspective. There are stages of life. Eating, Praying and Loving all represent a part of us that we must balance with the other. Eating represents the indulgence and carefree side to life, prayer is the spirituality within us all, and love...well, that's something that we all wish for and some of the lucky ones have. Love, though, doesn't just represent love between two people who are IN love, but rather being full of love and service towards those around us. We have to find a balance in all of those things.

I am trying to do that for myself. I wish you all balance and peace in your life. It is finding that balance that I think joy follows. We have to indulge sometimes, we must keep our spirit in tune, and we love. There is a great quote in this movie that I love -- "God dwells within us". I believe this with all of my heart. He is a part of us and it is when we tap into that part that we find Him.

Merry Christmas. May we all remember why we celebrate this season and what Christ represents. He is the eternal symbol of peace, joy and love. He is a symbol of sacrifice and service.

Love,

Courtney

Random Ramblings for Monday Monday

2011-11-21T17:36:00.001-05:00

1. Happy one month anniversary to my love! Best month of my life to date! Being married is great.

2. I took a four hour nap yesterday afternoon, which then resulted in me not going to sleep until almost 2am last night. I'm exhausted and am trying to avoid napping today so I don't start myself in some vicious bad sleeping cycle. Is 3:30pm too early to go to bed? Okay, fine....

3. I took an IQ test today. Guess who is in the top 2.3% of intelligences?!? Who knew?! I guess I'm perty smert after all.

4. I like my new financial aid advisor. She actually answers my emails and knows what she is talking about. Yay!

5. We don't get to go home for Christmas this year. I am SUPER bummed. I have never not been in Indiana for Christmas. I don't know how I'm handling it yet. I don't want to spend my first Christmas as a married couple crying. Haha.

6. Thanksgiving is THURSDAY! YESSSSSSS.

7. I think I'm still a little bitter about how many people in Indiana didn't come to my reception. Is that caddy of me? My family was there, which of course, was most important, but I invited like 150 people...all of whom I consider to be close friends or almost family, if not family. Barely 50 people were there. My mom's best friend and her daughter were home sick. I couldn't believe they didn't come. I mean, I understand being sick, but still...I didn't think there was anything that would keep them from not coming to celebrate my wedding. Only one of my friends from my single's branch back home stopped by, and he came when we were cleaning up. None of my mom's friends showed up that came to my shower. It was just weird. I know it sounds really petty, but it was, to date, the most important event in my life. Had I flaked out on any of them like that? I didn't think I had. My wedding was great, don't get me wrong, and I still had so much fun with those that were there, but to those that weren't, it did not go unnoticed.

So that's my Monday ramblings. I'll follow it up with a gratitude post soon...since I was doing a lot of complaining on this one.

Sorted thoughts.

2011-11-13T22:38:00.001-05:00

The dishwasher is running. The apartment is clean. My love is tucked in bed fast asleep and I have time to sip my herbal beverage and reflect on life.

I've already been a married woman for three weeks now. Time flies by. We attended our new ward today for the first time (for all three hours) and I really love it. I think we made a great move by going there instead of the married student ward. For those who are wondering, "what is a ward?" it is an LDS congregation of members in a certain geographical location. That is how the church is divided into individual congregations...or "wards". I believe it was derived from England where townships were called wards, or something like that. I digress. I felt so comfortable there. It helps that from the get-go we knew a handful of people, namely professors that teach where we attend school.

So the grand question, how is married life? Married life is wonderful. It is everything I have ever wanted it to be honestly. When I used to dream about how I wanted to be with my husband, this is what I've always dreamt of having. We love each other and he is my best friend in the whole wide world. There isn't any aspect of myself that I don't feel comfortable sharing with him. We have a great relationship and I feel we are off to a great start. It has been interesting to be asked "have you had any big blow ups yet"...and to those people I say, nope! I'm not saying that Ryan and I are the model couple for how to enter into a marriage, but I can say that I think we did things in a manner when we were dating and when we were engaged that tested our relationship, as well as helped our relationship naturally progress into marriage. Also, we don't sweat the small stuff. I think this can be HUGE. A guy in our ward that used to be Ryan's old roommate was one of the ones who asked us if we had fought yet (he is also a somewhat newlywed). He gave examples of "buttering your toast weird" or doing something that annoys the other person. When we said no, he looked shocked! I can only assume he might not have been so lucky! :) I know that our relationship won't always be this hunky-dory love fest, but we are good so far so why worry about it right now!!! We didn't have too many adjustments to make, so life is just great. That's all I have to say about that.

I'm registered for classes next semester...so it's back to school, back to school, to show my Dad, that I'm no fool (thanks, Billy Madison). I still have mixed feelings about the whole thing, but it will be nice to be back in the swing of things. Two of my professors are in my ward and one of Ryan's professors is our bishop. So no slacking off for us!!!

Man, I had so much on my mind earlier and now all I ramble on about it how great life is.
I have other things I could gripe about, but I frankly don't feel like doing that. I'm going to go back to sipping my herbal beverage and going to bed soon. Bed by 9pm? Welcome to married life. I ain't mad about it either.

Love,

Mrs. Whitear

Click on the link!

2011-11-10T13:49:00.001-05:00

One week!!

2011-10-14T19:14:00.001-04:00

In case you didn't know...in one week from right now I'll be 45 minutes from being married to my love!

Root Beer of the Month: Grand Teton Brewing Company

2011-10-07T01:21:00.000-04:00

This month Ryan and I tried the Grand Teton Brewing Company's Root Beer. One word....

DELISH.

Subtle flavor, creamy texture, rich and smooth. We both loved it.

To quote their website: "The same recipe you've come to know and love in Old Faithful Root Beer, our kettle brewed root beer is a true classic. We brew this root beer with only the finest ingredients including pure Teton mountain spring water, 100% cane sugar, sassafras, vanilla, and just a hint of wintergreen. This refreshing blend is sure to satisfy even the most demanding root beer enthusiasts. It also makes a great root beer float!"

I couldn't agree more! It was kind of fun to try a Root Beer that was local to our area. Definitely one to have again someday!

We are technically cheating this month because we will have be having a new Root Beer at our wedding reception...but we're not counting it so ha! :)

Nothing like an ice cold (ROOT) beer. Enjoy!

A Temple Marriage

2011-10-07T01:14:00.001-04:00

Well I must say I'm very happy with the changes that Blogger is doing these days. I love the new designs!! I like the cutsie little blog backgrounds too, but it's time for a change I think.

Speaking of change....um, hello? I'm getting married in TWO freaking WEEKS from tomorrow! (I know you're all aware.)

So what has been on my mind?

Okay, a lot honestly.

Today I just want to focus on one thing. It's a very important thing...

The Temples of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints.

What are Temples?

For those who do know, and those who will now know, I am a member of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. I'm actually a convert to the Church and was baptized when I was 17 years old. I'm coming up on my ten year anniversary of my baptism. There is a symbol of our faith that is very sacred to the members of our Church: The Temple. For those outside of our faith, the Temple might seem very intimidating or misunderstood. We are often accused of being "secretive" because what happens inside the temple is not discussed. We are allowed to talk about some aspects, but as far as the ordinances themselves, they are simply too sacred and too deep for those outside to truly understand. It is only within the walls of this holy place, that the ordinances of the Temple can be absorbed and understood fully. That is because the Spirit of God is stronger in a temple than in any other place in the world. You literally feel like you've left the world and stepped into a little piece of heaven when you walk into it's majestic doors. Something I have been struggling with for years is the fact that because of my strong faith and belief in the restored Gospel and also in temples on Earth today, I am a bit of an outsider in my family. Since they are not LDS, and since I have lived much of my life after my conversion on my own, my beliefs are still somewhat of a mystery to them. Sure, they know I follow certain "rules" and that I choose to abstain from things like alcohol, tobacco, premarital sex, etc. I am much more conservative. The temple aspect of my marriage is the most important, but it has also been the most difficult aspect of my marriage to share with my family.

The Temple is a place of learning. It is a place of peace. It is a place of healing. It is a house of salvation. As Latter Day Saints, a core doctrine of our church is that the family unit can be eternal. This is done by a sealing ordinance performed only in the Temples of the Church by a priesthood holder who has been given the authorization to perform the sealing ordinance. This is done for the living and also for the dead.

The Family: A Proclamation to the World

So, since I am a believing Latter Day Saint, and my fiance is as well, we will be married in a Temple. The temple you see here actually (this is the Rexburg Idaho temple, which is where we live). There are about 150 temples throughout the world at this time, and that number continues to grow at a rapid rate.

We are so excited to be married in the Temple, but both of us have several (and in my case, all) family members who are not able to attend the sealing ceremony. It has torn me apart from the beginning...and we are trying to accomodate everyone. We have chosen to have a ring ceremony so my dad can walk me down an aisle and so our families can be a part of this incredible occasion. What I have realized is how much, even after 10 years, my family doesn't know about my faith. There is still so much that is a mystery to them. They have asked me questions here and there, but I don't ever want them to think I am shoving my religion down their throats. It has always been a topic that I don't discuss often unless they ask me questions. I hope that I live my life through example. However, they will all be here in two weeks. They will all see a temple for the first time (with the exception of my dad but he's only seen it once). They will actually come inside and see the foyer and the waiting room. The Rexburg Temple is open and beautiful in the entrance. This is a part of my life that I don't necessarily keep private, but I don't blast it out loud. Now I'm sharing this part of my life with those who are most important to me and I guess you could say that I'm nervous. I want them to feel what I feel when I am there. I want them to want to know more, if only for the fact that I believe so much in my faith, that the sealing ceremony is essential, despite them not being able to be a part of it.

Anyways....that has been on my mind. Ryan and I have both had our Bishop's interviews for our new temple recommends (all members of the Church who wish to perform ordinances in the temple must obtain a recommend to do so by being interviewed by their Bishop to ensure they are living their life according to a certain standard). We are so happy to be able to be sealed for time and all eternity. We have performed sealings by proxy for many deceased individuals...it is through those experiences that I really understood the promises I am making with him and more importantly, what covenants I'm making with God. I wish this blessing upon everyone. There is nothing like the knowledge of an eternal family.

For all those interested, there is a great and well explained article that is very unbiased explaining temple marriages. You can see it here: What is Temple Marriage?

The LDS faith has been much more out in the open lately due to many things...I hope that through this, people can answer their own questions regarding our faith. The best way to learn about what we believe is to ask someone who believes it and studies it. I have a close friend (well, unfortunately a couple of close friends) who have fallen away from the Church for various reasons. It's interesting to see the pattern that happens. Even in my own past, I have questioned the doctrines of the Gospel. I can assure you....the Gospel is true in it's entirety. The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints is Christ's church on the Earth today and it is led by a living prophet and apostles. The Gospel is the plan of peace. I have watched as those I love that have fallen away begin their questioning because they first sin. We are all sinners; however, I have realized that sins of morality make us particularly vulnerable to the lies that Satan can weave in our heads. Those sins keep us out of the Temple by jeopardizing our worthiness to enter a holy place such as the Temple. It is then that we can get kicked while we're down. It just makes me sad. It makes me sad to see someone fall into the trap of Satan's lies when they know more. Well, anyways, I feel like I'm rambling now (which I, undoubtedly, am doing).

I love the temple. I love my Savior. I love my family. I love my Ryan. I wish you all to have the opportunity to kneel at an altar with your love and promise to love them forever. I wish you all the opportunity to feel the peace of the temple.

I know, I know. Slacker = me.

2011-09-30T01:45:00.000-04:00

Well gosh! It's been a while again. I always have so much to say but then I get to the point where I have TOO much to say and then I decide just to give up and not say it at all because it would be too exhausting to try to remember everything I wanted to say and you'd be stuck reading ridiculously long run-on sentences like this one and I would turn either really red or really blue from talking without taking a breath........

:: GASP ::

Okay, granted, that was all written down, but in my head I was running out of breath. You could hear it in your own head, couldn't you? Well you should have.

A wedding is to be had in 21 days.

TWENTY.
ONE.
DAYS.

HOLY................
(you can choose your favorite word)

Getting married has been the most surreal process for me. Maybe it's because I'm just someone who adapts easily but this is just my life now. I jump up and down sometimes with Ryan in the apartment when we talk about the fact we get to be together forever, or that he doesn't have to go home anymore because he'll just be home, or that we get to do it. I mean, er, um....freak, who the heck am I kidding? I'm totally excited about that. I'm not ashamed. It's not dirty. It's normal! (Sorry, Dad.) We pretty much act married and almost live like we're married (minus the aforementioned) so it will be nice to just BE married.

:: steps onto a soapbox ::

Now is when I would like to advocate the idea of being engaged for 6 months. Ryan and I knew we were going to get married almost right after we started dating. As crazy as it sounds, that's how it rolled out. I just knew. It was weird; however, (and sorry to say this ) that unlike MANY, dare I say, a majority of my fellow college colleagues, we wanted to be together for a solid 9 months before getting hitched. That could include the engagement, but we felt that being in a relationship prior to marriage for that amount of time would give us ample time to get to know one another and to be ready to make an eternal commitment. Our engagement really couldn't have gone better. Bit by bit we have progressed to where we are now, which is perfect for transitioning into being married. We are ready to be married and not just because we want to do it. We have slowly been able to transition into sharing everything (money, food, etc). We have slowly transitioned into spending more and more time together (albeit, we have spent a total of about 7 days away from each other for the last 8 months). We have been able to address situations and really get to know what the other person wants and expects. We have had lots of time to show our true colors. When you are only with someone for four months from date #1 to marriage, I really don't understand how it could be a smooth or easy transition. I know at 3 months, although I was engaged to Ryan, I wasn't ready to be living with him and married yet. Neither was he. I know some things work for some people that don't for others, but for my LDS friends, I would just like to say that now that I have experienced it first hand, I still stand firm in having a relationship between 9 months to a year before you tie the knot. I think it would save so many couples, especially young couples, heartache and questions and arguments. Can you really know someone, I mean, TRULY know someone after 3 months? I didn't even fart in front of Ryan until we'd been together that long (and that's only because he's gross and likes it!) We need time to adjust. That's just how we are as human beings. Now, to you guys who got married quick, I think you know what you're talking about. No marriage is perfect, but I think a lot of misunderstandings can be avoided by giving things time before you are stuck. And to top it all off, for us LDS folk, you are making a covenant to God and with your spouse to be with them FOREVER. Like, eternity. No death to get you out of anything. They will be there waiting for you on the other side if you screw them over. Divorce really shouldn't be an option. Marriage isn't just about being in love, it's about committing yourself to being a team and living your life with your spouse, come hell or high water.

:: steps off ::

Now that I've gotten that off my chest.....

I'm enjoying life. I'm enjoying the idea of marriage and I'm enjoying working part time and allowing myself to slow down for a while. I was struggling to keep up with myself for a while there, and now I can breathe. I've enjoyed traveling and setting up our new apartment. I'm enjoying the freshly washed bedding. It's just nice. I'm trying really hard to take life a day at a time. I think life is easier that way. :)

I wish I had pictures for you, but I don't. Although, soon enough I'll have wedding pictures!!!!

Soapy Cup

2011-08-16T23:36:00.000-04:00

So I bought this cup....

and I love it.

But it tastes like soap (which I don't remember using any soap in it thus far....) everytime I get to the bottom of the cup.

Hm....

Vacation :)

2011-08-14T00:16:00.000-04:00

Ryan and I spent 11 days traveling what felt like all over the place! Since we live a pretty good distance from both families, we hadn't had the opportunity to meet each other's families until this trip. It was SO much fun! We flew out of Salt Lake to Long Beach. We stayed with one of Ryan's sisters, Keri and her family. We did a lot in a few short days!! California is fun, but man oh man, it is congested! I've never really seen anything like it. The traffic is horrible and it takes like an hour to get anywhere! We had a great time though. We did some work at the Los Angelos Temple, went to Universal and Hollywood, ate a LOT of AMAZING food, and I was exhausted at the end of each and every day! Here are some pictures from California.

Our Jet into Long Beach!

The coast :) Soooo beautiful!

Our first picture on the west coast!

Our first kiss on the coast! haha!

The coast is only about 10 minutes from his sister's place. Must be nice!

My first In n' Out -- don't hate me but I didn't really think it was any better than other burger places (i.e. Five Guys or Steak n Shake)

The newest addition to the family!! Ryan's nephew, Aison...or as Ryan calls him "The Ginger". He has a little patch of auburn brown hair on the back of his head. Ryan is SO cute with the baby.

Look at his face. LOL

At the Korean Bell. These are supposedly fertility statues and if you touch them, you are promised fertility. Ryan insisted. LOL.

The LA Temple. HUGE.

Probably my favorite thing ever was watching Ryan with Aison strapped on in the baby backpack. He carried him around while we were at the beach. Can you say precious?!

Cabrillo Beach

Walk of Fame.

JULIA ROBERTS DOES NOT HAVE A STAR.

I REPEAT, JULIA DOES NOT HAVE A STAR.

I. was. heartbroken.

Me and Samuel L. Jackson.

Okay fine, me with a wax sculpture of him. It looks pretty real though, right!?

Ryan with his kindred spirit....Forrest Gump.

Phil Collins' star.

Did I mention that Julia Roberts has no star?

Universal City walk.

We ate at Bubba Gump Shrimp Co.

OMG it was AMAZING.

After our trip to California, we hopped yet another jet plane and flew to my lovely little home state of Indiana. My bridal shower was the next day and after that we went to dinner with my whole family. The rest of the time was pretty quiet, as it was just me, Ryan, and my Dad. However, my Dad arguably knows more about Indianapolis than anyone. Ever. So he was our official tour guide and drove us around downtown, the westside, as well as other locations. The highlight for Ryan was going to the Indianapolis Motor Speedway Museum. We took a special grounds tour and got to see a lot of cool stuff. I lived in Indianapolis for the first 24 years of my life and have been to several races at the Speedway, but even I had never seen a lot of this stuff. Pictures........

The Start/Finish Line made of the original bricks laid.

The flag podium.

Our tour bus.

The media pagoda. We got a tour of the inside of that as well.

Ryan "kissing the bricks" which has now become a tradition for many winning drivers to do after they have won a race here.

The 100th anniversary brick of the Indianapolis Motor Speedway.

Press Conference Room

We're so important.

Winner, Winner, Chicken dinner!!!

Us on the first place stand on winner's circle.

The 500 trophy.

We went to Hinkle Fieldhouse to see where the Butler Bulldogs play. I've been on Butler's campus 100 times and had never been inside. It is so neat!!!

So....that was our trip. We had a blast and the families seem to approve. :) That's always a good thing!

I'm really grateful I'm marrying into a family that is loud and crazy and warm. I'm glad my family, although they didn't get to spend a lot of time with us on this trip, was so welcoming and loving to Ryan.

School Blues

2011-07-20T22:27:00.000-04:00

School is done for another semester!!!!!!!!!!!

I don't think I can begin to express just how happy I am about this news. The last two semesters have been ROUGH. Really, really ROUGH. It wasn't because the classes are particularly hard, it was because I was so tired and burnt out that I had no more motivation to do it. But now, I have a five month break. Breaks are good. I just got a job at a media marketing company in town and will still teach voice lessons.

Life is good now.

July Root Beer

2011-07-17T05:08:00.001-04:00

For our July root beer adventure we tried Thomas Kemper root beer. Its a company based out of Oregon. They make their root beer with cane sugar and honey. We were big fans of this one! It has a sweet and smooth, creamy texture. It was easy to drink. You could taste the honey which gave it a unique but familiar flavor. Ry and I both give this a 4.5 out of 5.

What will technology do to our preservation of history?

2011-07-12T16:31:00.002-04:00

I'm just like millions of Americans who are crazed by technology. I own a smartphone, a MAC computer, an iPad, an iPod touch....I tweet, I Facebook, I'm LinkedIn and I'm even on Google+. I take pictures on my phone and upload them onto my computer or to Facebook, where they undoubtedly sit for months on end.

I do, however, have several pictures hanging in my room. I love pictures. I love being able to look at people I love whenever I want. I don't forget what they look like and I'm reminded of happy events, beautiful places and so many other good times in my life. Someone in my room the other day noticed I have no pictures of Ryan in my room. Well, I haven't gotten around to printing any off!

Every month I get my subscription to Real Simple magazine. I love this magazine. Before I had a subscription, around the 15th of the month, I would stalk the magazine racks at the grocery store. Ask Carlee Miller how I reacted when I realized the new issue was out. A small child's energy somehow finds its way out and I may or may not jump up and down a little. There is something about the smell of the pages, and the beauty of way the magazine is put together.

But it's not just Real Simple that gets me lit up. It's books in general. Maybe it's an inherited trait or a learned trait from my dad (My dad has a floor to ceiling, wall to wall bookshelf in my old room and it's full), but I have books everywhere in my room. I have magazines stacked here and there (neatly organized...I'm not nor will I ever be a candidate for that crazy hoarding show). I have books on bookshelves. I can spend HOURS in Barnes and Noble. I just love books! The irony is I don't read them very often. And yes, most of the books I own are books about music or food. I have eBooks, and I'm fearing that many of those eBooks will take over good REAL books. When generations from now look back on us, will books be archeology? I hope not!

There is another aspect to technology that concerns me. Our personal history. I have kept journals since I was around 12 years old. However, now, and since the age of 19 or so, I have kept some sort of personal records online. I don't even remember the website's name of a live journal that I had at one time or another. I've had my blog for a while now, but with the touch of a button, it could be deleted. Facebook might even be a thing of the past if Google+ has anything to do with it. When my mom died, some of my most cherised possessions of hers are pictures. I wish she had would have kept journals. These two things could become obsolete with modern technology. Will this hinder the future generations in understanding their ancestors?

Indiana just passed a bill where they will no longer be teaching cursive writing to children in schools. Will children in a couple of generations from now look at old cursive and not be able to understand or read it? Will it be hieroglyphics? A person's handwriting says a lot about them. It can actually be a way to identify someone. . I understand that typing is becoming more important than cursive, but we should still be teaching it! I don't know...it just all seems fishy to me. On the back of those pictures that I love so much, was my mom's handwriting. It was personal to her. A lot of people print the same, but their cursive is really what shows their penmanship. Good handwriting (good writing for that matter!) is becoming a lost art! It again emphasizes my question: Will technology make written things obsolete? Will my favorite magazine no longer be around when I'm old because we have programmed our children, literally programmed them, into technological freaks who only read things on a computer screen?

If we can delete something online with the touch of button, can we, ourselves, become obsolete? Will we be eaten up in cyberspace? Will we become a society that is inept to carpel tunnel syndrome and near sighted-ness because we sit in front of computers all day long? Technology is embracing isolation even though we have social networking at our fingertips by putting us in front of our computers by ourselves inside. If we aren't careful, technology could do just as much evil as it does good.

Maw-iage is what brings us together today.

2011-06-30T16:01:00.000-04:00

Being engaged has all sorts of adventurous situations where in to learn from. This semester Ryan and I are taking a class from the Family and Home Education Department appropriately titled, "Marriage". Here at good ol' "BYU-I do" almost all of us take a religion course titled, "Preparing for Eternal Marriage", which Ryan and I have both taken before; however, the marriage class we are in this semester focuses more on marriage itself. How do you strengthen your marriage? Is marriage really important? How to communicate in marriage. Our professor is also a counselor so it is kind of like a little group counseling session on marriage.
I've watched those around me who are married. As the youngest in my family, I am the last one to be married. As much as I love my dad and stepmom, I wouldn't consider them to have a model marriage. But, I would say that through trials and probably many situations where one or both could have thrown in the towel, they have been married for over 20 years now. They've stuck with it. That is commendable in and of itself. It has shown me the reality of marriage. Since Ryan and I both come from divorced parents (Ryan's parents divorced when he was two, mine when I was four) I think both of us have had our major setbacks about marriage in and of itself. I know for myself, I have always been scared of divorce. I am scared of losing my spouse before we are old and ready to die. I was scared to trust someone that much. I was worried that no one would ever love me the way I felt I needed and wanted to be loved.
We all know the marriage statistics. Half of all first marriages end in divorce. HALF. One out of every TWO. It is comforting to know that marriages performed in the LDS temples are about 10% lower than that, but the number is still high. So why are we still getting married so much and for what reasons? Why is divorce so prevalent nowadays, when, in the 1960's the divorce rate was significantly lower?
As I think about my relationship with Ryan, I'm so grateful for the engagement period. We get to practice some aspects of marriage (mainly the idea of being solely being committed to each other and no one else) along with making decisions together and really settling in to the idea of being together always. I also appreciate our old fashioned values when it comes to honoring a chaste and virtuous life together. In a world like today's, that is definitely a difficult task, but I feel like it makes our love and appreciation for each other stronger. I know that our marriage will have hard days and hard times, but I'm so grateful I've found someone who loves me the way I need to be loved and who is committed to me. We are both so imperfect yet we are both so perfect for each other. I wish I knew where life is taking us, but only time will tell.

Hooray for marriage! :)

(Oh, and engagement photos will be soon!!!)

Four Months :)

2011-06-21T15:56:00.002-04:00

In exactly four months, I'll be Mrs. Ryan Whitear.

Smiles all around!!!

Root Beer Adventures

2011-06-19T20:00:00.000-04:00

Ryan and I have started a new little journey. We are going to become root beer connoisseurs. Once a month we will try a new root beer and give it our honest opinion.

This month we tried an Australian Root Beer called Bundaberg.

From the Bundaberg website their description says: "Traditionally brewed to a genuine old recipe from real sarsaparilla root, licorice root, vanilla beans and molasses."

I'd say that's very accurate. We didn't hate this root beer, but I don't think we'll be having it again anytime soon. The licorice flavor was notable and in my opinion, overpowering. The smooth, creamy texture of some of my favorite root beers was lacking. Bundaberg packed a bit of a bite.

Ryan gave this root beer a 3.5. He didn't seem to mind the taste.

I give this root beer a solid 2. It was a bit too strong on licorice for me.

I did enjoy the packaging though. I thought the bottles were unique and fun.

Two dresses for sale!!

2011-06-17T19:26:00.000-04:00

I have two beautiful wedding dresses for sale. (I bought them long before I was engaged...not with the purpose of keeping them, but to sell them!)

They are both from J. Crew. They retail for $600!!!!! I'm selling them for $100 (plus shipping). They are each 100% silk. One is a halter, the other a sleeveless v-neck. They are elegant, classy, and simple.

The Halter (size 10):

The Sleeveless V-Neck (Size 12):

Please pass along the info if you know anyone who would want to buy either of these gorgeous dresses.

I have no words for this title.

2011-06-08T03:26:00.000-04:00

I can either sleep for 14 hours or not sleep at all. My stomach gets upset every time I eat. I am craving salt and carbs like it's my job. I am exhausted and I just want to cry sometimes. I'm SO over school that I can scarcely take it.

On the other hand, Ryan is the cutest, best future husband a girl could ask for. I stayed home sick today and when he came over he told me to go get my hairbrush and some lotion. He made me take tylenol because I felt hot and maybe had a fever. He brushed my hair for a while and then he put lotion on my feet and rubbed then. Later, I was hungry and all I wanted was grilled cheese and soup. Ryan isn't much of a cook...he makes dutch pancakes and scrambled eggs and rice in a rice cooker. But he made me grilled cheese and ramen and it was PERFECT. He made it all by himself and when I tried to help he made me go lay back down. He cleaned up the dishes and was so patient and sweet to me. This, my friends, is one lucky girl. He told me I looked cute when I'm sick. Seriously, I don't know how I found him but thank goodness I'm keeping him!

So, obviously my life is great..I'm just so stressed about school and work. This is how my body reacts to stress...I know that's what is going on. I'm so stressed out I'm making myself sick.

I just need to breathe.
And maybe do some yoga.
Six more weeks and then I'll have five months off from school.

You can do this. You can do this. You can do this.

Legend.....

2011-05-11T15:15:00.000-04:00

wait for it.

.............-ary.

Legendary.

Right now I'm sitting here in a very non creeper fashion enjoying a little salad at the Crossroads on campus and in front of me is an old man. He is clearly close to 80 years old. A calzone and pasta for lunch. He has a british accent. To every other student he is just an old man. We talk to old people like children....but I know who this old man is.

Norman Bailey is a world-renowned opera singer from Europe. In the 1970's, Bailey was widely famous in the opera community and has graced the stage of most opera houses on the European continent. Think of all that travel, all those experiences that are stored in his brain.

And then I sit here and watch him eat in Rexburg, Idaho. All that knowledge. To most, just an old man eating lunch.

To those who know....treasures upon treasures of knowledge. A opera legend.

Thursday Thoughts

2011-05-06T01:30:00.000-04:00

I miss Ryan. We only see each other like an hour or so a day right now. I love him SO much.

Carbs be gone....again.

I love my calling.

Feliz Cinco de Mayo. I made homemade steak quesadillas in celebration for me and Ry tonight. They were amazing.

Just Dance 2. Cardio. Enough said.

New MAC makeup = YES.

Madama Butterfly

2011-05-04T02:14:00.000-04:00

I will be studying and performing this duet this semester for our Opera Workshop Class. I am PUMPED.

Monday thoughts.

2011-05-03T01:43:00.002-04:00

Here are the summarizing thoughts for Monday:

1. Mondays are not my best days for being motivated but I still managed. My day started off a bit hectic. I was excited at the idea that I didn't have class until 11:30a so I thought "Ahhhh...I'll just stay in bed for a little while and take my time getting ready." This was at 10am. Then, as I looked at my calendar, I realized that today, was in fact, my first voice lesson with THE Stanford Olsen. Stanford is a guest professor this semester at school. He is an artist in residence at Florida State where he teaches primarily graduate school students and has had a very extensive performing career in opera. In essence, he's kind of a big deal. I am SOOOO excited to study with him this semester. Luckily this wasn't my first impression for him. We have met several times prior and he didn't mind that I was 10 minutes late, but I minded! However, all ended well and I am excited to see what the semester holds.

2. Just Dance. Thank you for getting me to move and sweat today.

3. Dear Rexburg Wind. I'm tired of not being able to open my windows.

4. I love Ryan. Only five and a half months left!!!

5. Sad for my good friend who got into some trouble over the weekend. He and his wife are in my prayers. I know the consequences of his actions are going to be severe...which just makes me so worried for him. Please pray for my friend as well.

6. Tuesdays are supposed to be my day off...but they have ended up being just as busy as the others! Gotta make that money I guess!!!

Loves to all!

Weddin'

2011-04-08T22:48:00.000-04:00

Here's what has been on my mind lately...

(all photos from TheKnot.com)

Courtney and Ryan are GETTING MARRIED!!!

2011-04-04T05:01:00.000-04:00

Below is the link to my wedding website (yes, I said WEDDING). Ryan Whitear is going to be my hu-band!! We will be getting married in October. :) So excited! So excited! So excited!

TheKnot

Friday and Random Things

2011-03-25T12:52:00.000-04:00

My nails are painted lavendar and I have everything on my desktop organized into folders.
I guess that makes me a compartmentalized person.
Lately, I've had trouble sleeping and my mornings are groggy.
Sometimes I'd rather be a makeup artist or a cook than a singer.
I like books and I own many. I collect magazines and cookbooks.
I have a whiteboard that's blank.
I am surrounded by pictures in order to be surrounded by people.

Today is random Friday. These are random facts.

New Design

2011-03-24T16:54:00.002-04:00

The blog needed a little less bling and a little more beauty.

You likey?

Adele. Obsessed.

2011-03-24T01:45:00.000-04:00

Just a little kiss

2011-03-22T06:58:00.000-04:00

You know the best thing about being in a relationship? Kissing :)

Alas, my ode to the wonderful, innocent kiss.

(Um, I promise when Ryan kisses me, I'm always wearing a shirt)

Sometimes kissing can be a little more colorful!!

And since Prince isn't cool enough to have his music videos on youtube, the next best thing is a clip from Pretty Woman. Go to 3:40 on the clip. I just love everything about this movie. It wasn't until years after I'd seen it that I heard the original version of this song.

And here's the 3rd best thing: A glee remake.

And of course, an ode to the epic movie kisses.

And you can't forget our furry friends! Their kisses are so sweet!

::sigh::

Where's Ryan right now!? hehehe.

Lovey Dovey.

2011-02-22T00:52:00.000-05:00

Who's in love?

:: raises hand :: PICK ME! PICK ME!

:: sigh ::

Good day to you sir.

2011-02-20T02:48:00.000-05:00

Okay, so I remember when I used to see people playing this stupid games on facebook and I thought, "Psh. Facebook games are so LAME. Why do people get so into them."

Ugh.

Hello my name is Courtney....

and I'm addicted to ESPNU and Social City.

So, now, you all must get on and play these games to we can be neighbors and friends and stuff.

Or not.

Step one is just admitting there is a problem, right?

Happy Valentine's Day!

2011-02-14T15:28:00.000-05:00

Happy Valentine's Day!!!

This is my valentine :) Ryan and I have been dating since the beginning of the semester. Today marks our one month anniversary since our first date and I can honestly say I've never been happier. I feel like we've been together forever so it's kind of funny to say that we've only been dating for a month. He is the BEST boyfriend. We compliment each other so well and although I was apprehensive to say it (even though I knew it) at first because I'm a total cynic and never believed it was possible, I love him with all of my heart and have since the first week! Crazy, I know. I guess my friends were right that "when you know, you know". We have so much fun together and he has helped me be a better woman already. Ryan is different than anyone I've ever met. He's crazy, and can be shy or loud depending on who he is around. He eats like a caveman and he has the heart of a child. He is dependable, on time, and is strong in all the areas I'm not. I am so grateful for him. I'm so excited to have a valentine as wonderful as him.

I hope you all are able to celebrate your love with someone. I've spent a lot of valentine's days celebrating the ones I love, and this year is no different. I'm so blessed for having so many in my life that I love and that love me in return.

And PS.....I have glasses now. Here ya go.

Whoa. It's been a long long LONG time!

2011-02-01T14:15:00.002-05:00

My bad, y'all.

I have an entry I want to share with you...but alas, it must wait.

Season's Greetings!

2010-11-28T16:26:00.000-05:00

It's the last day of Thanksgiving break. I can honestly say, almost guilt-ily (I doubt that is a word...), that I did, indeed, take a break this week. I watched a boat load of movies and food network, I did yoga a couple of times, I baked a ton, cooked Thanksgiving dinner for friends, slept...and I've looked at some of my school work but not that much. So now it's Sunday afternoon, and I'm attempting to relish in these last few quiet hours. The noise outside is picking up and the last three weeks of the semester will commence soon.

I got something yesterday that I haven't gotten in a long time and I'm super happy about it. A library card! I think that the library is a long lost treasure today. I'm not talking about the school library, which is equally as cool I know, but the public library. The Madison County library isn't really anything in particular to write home about (but I am writing about it on my blog...so I guess that counts for something) but the idea that I can go check out a book at no cost and enjoy it is a lost art in our society these days. We rely on the internet for everything. I am just as guilty as I tend to "google" everything! But I absolutely loved roaming around the library. It made my heart happy. It was quiet and neat and full of knowledge. I checked out three cookbooks (you're shocked, I know).

My health has been a little rocky lately and it has been a bit frustrating. Nothing life threatening, but definitely annoying and bothersome. Medication is not resolving the issue in a way that is suiting to me, so I am going to resort to something I've had in my back pocket. For the next few weeks (I'm not sure exactly how many yet...but at least two) I can only eat veggies, legumes, some dairy (although that is mainly limited to cheese), lean protein, and good fats. I have had for quite some time a condition called "Insulin Resistance". Essentially what this means is that my body does not know how to properly break down sugar correctly and is resistant to the effects of insulin. Those who are insulin resistant and allow it to go untreated can and most eventually develop type 2 diabetes. For someone who loves food (and carbs!) as much as I do, it is very difficult and expensive to do this diet, which is why I typically try to handle it in other ways, but what do I have to lose? At max, 6 weeks out of my life carbless isn't going to do anything but do good things for me. Luckily, due to my culinary knowledge, I am able to branch out and find good and interesting things to occupy my palette, but I know from past experience that it can be a challenge. I'm also choosing to do this through the holidays, but it really can't wait.

I'm looking forward to the next few weeks. They will still be busy and bustling but I can't believe that my fifth semester is almost done! I've started looking at graduate programs and have, as of right now, narrowed it down to the following schools -- Manhattan School of Music, Julliard, Indiana U., USC, Utah State (if they have a master's in my area by then) and Eastman School of Music at the University of Rochester. It's a beasty list....but I'm excited at the idea of grad school. Julliard's program is free which would be fantastic, and there are other schools in which I could hopefully find an assistanceship or something like that to help with the expense. Manhattan is my top school offering a three year, double masters degree in music and in the arts of education. This would be that after I graduate from there, I would have a two masters degrees and be able to teach K-12 if I so desired. My desire is to perform for a while as I'm teaching private voice, but then eventually end up as a professor or something of the sorts somewhere. That is plan "not married". Haha. So basically, that's the plan!

Well, I'm just rambling on about nothing that is too exciting. The snow has been around for a good week now and winter is settling in. Christmas time is here!! Allow me to share with you my FAVORITE christmas song....

Happy and Merry!

Five New Temples Announced

2010-10-02T15:46:00.000-04:00

Please take the time to read this article.

Today is a GREAT day! I can't even tell you the amount of joy I feel that a temple will be built in my hometown.

Five New Temples Announced

Jazz and Friday Nights

2010-10-01T23:44:00.001-04:00

TGIF. Don't you just love Fridays?!

Here's why I currently loved this Friday.

1. It's an absolutely beautiful day outside. No clouds. High 84. Low 40.

2. The Farmer's Market in fall. Need I say more? Authentic Italian homemade Foccacia bread and asiago cheese bread. Artisan sheep's milk cheese. Mmmm.....

3. Cleaning my room and organizing the drawers in my desk that had become a disarray.

4. The scent of my cinnamon plum candle.

5. Jazz music. Lots and lots of jazz music.

6. Talking to Adam on the phone for the first time in a week!

7. Only two classes and no work. YES!

8. Tomorrow is the weekend. :)

Happy Friday to you!

Courtney

le Tutor

2010-09-26T01:50:00.000-04:00

This semester I took a job as a music tutor for theory as well as diction for singers. I can say that I'm quite a bit busier than I ever expected to be, but I am really loving my job. It only pays $8/hr but I haven't had a job in so long that has been worthwhile or made consistent money that I'm THRILLED with $8/hr.

My schedule has been nothing short of boring, so my apologies for my lack of posts lately (sidenote, I did spoil you rotten over my summer break. Sometimes, even two a day). School is in full swing, and my life has gone back to hectic schmectic.

Despite my busy schedule I can tell you that I feel more at easy with my life everyday. Is everything in my life perfect? Heck no, tech-i-no. But for some reason, it doesn't matter anymore. I finally am starting to see that life is what you make it. Life is here to enjoy and do the Lord's work. It is here to live and be happy. For me in particular, my life is filled with all sorts of wonderful things. I have beautiful music surrounding me every day. I walk up and down the halls in the Snow Performing Arts building (aka my home away from home....I swear they need cots downstairs) and I hear a saxophone playing a jazzy melody, followed by a cellist bowing on the deep, rich and warm strings of their instrument, then to hear someone warming up their voice or rehearsing for the Opera. I hear the piano being pounded away. It is everywhere. I just love it. Then, I have my cozy and beautiful room to come home to. I have my little bed with my soft, white comforter and pictures of inspiring things and the family and friends that I love most dear surrounding me on my walls. I have reminders of all the things I adore in this world. I look out my window and to my left, there is a magnificent temple of God standing in miraculous awe. It is white and bright and absolutely stunning. Then to my right, the twinkling lights of the valley below. In the mornings, especially when there are no clouds, I can see the mountain ranges in the distance and you can see for miles and miles.

Then there is my slight obsession with food. Not just any food though. I'm not talking twinkies and doughnuts here people. I'm talking about walking around the Rexburg Farmer's Market staring at the ears of corn, the beautiful fall harvest's selection of anything fruit or vegetable your little heart desires. One of my favorite places in the world is a beautiful, clean grocery store. I wish I had my own farm stand to pick fresh food from every day. I get my farm fresh chickens from the same guys every week. The banana bread that I made today actually melts a little in your mouth. The best part is that everything in it is good for you. Even the real sugar. :)

Sure, school and tutoring are time consuming. I spend almost all week on campus from 10am-8 or 9pm every single day. But I've decided that those days are filled with learning and teaching; growing and progressing.

I've been thinking a lot about marriage lately (no surprise I think about relationships. I'm a mormon....and I'm 26....a woman....and I go to BYU-"I DO"). My religion class this semester is "Preparing for Eternal Marriage". It's apparently a big enough commitment that it needs a its own class. I'm so looking forward to the day where I know that the person I'm seeing across from me on that alter is my best friend and the man who will stick by me. He will be my teammate in life. It's taken a little longer than I have hoped, but some of that is my own fault. I think I'm finally thinking about really, truly, allowing myself to hang on to the hope that someone is out there that is worthy of my love and I of his love.

So anywho, that is what has been on my mind tonight.

I hope you're all well. :)

Xoxo,

Courtney

Sabbath Tidings

2010-09-13T00:19:00.000-04:00

In lieu of the Sabbath, please allow me to share a video with you.

I love the peace that following the Gospel brings into our life if we allow it to do so. It is so easy to get caught up in the world. It is so easy to be lazy and cavalier about life. It is so easy to be distracted by so much noise. I love this message. Props to AP for telling me about it so I can pass it on!

Happy Sabbath!

Courtney

First day of 15th grade!

2010-09-10T01:01:00.001-04:00

Translated: First day of Junior year at BYUI.

It was rainy today.

That means great news for my wardrobe. I broke out my PINK RAIN BOOTS. Any excuse to wear these bad boys is a good one. So, anyone new who met me today learned something that most people figure out rather quickly anyways. I like the color pink. Between the pink boots, pink earrings, pink undershirt (I wore a gray dress with my jean jacket over it..pink under the dress), my pink phone and pink bookbag....yeah...I like pink.

Is it ironic that I never say pink is my favorite color? My favorite colors are actually purple and light blue. But pink seems to be the color that I find myself connecting to on a personal level more often than not. I guess it's what makes me...well, me!

What happened to dressing up on the first day of school? Does college not count? I think it should. My roommate Megan and I were discussing the fact that the world, working and students, are becoming more and more casual. Kids don't dress up for school pictures anymore or the first day of school it seems. Heck, back in the day (and that day would be when my parents were in school, so it was pretty far back there! Sorry Dad!), girls dressed up to go to school everyday! Skirts were common place and women looked like women. Little girls looked like little girls. Granted I am happy the men's basketball shorts are longer. (That fashion idea never made sense to me. I do not need to see your hairy thighs!!) No one even dresses up very fancy for weddings or church anymore. Casual used to be a button up shirt and some slacks or maybe jeans. Now, sweats and such are our go-to outfits far more than they should be.

I think we need to make a movement to bring fancy back.

(I'm bringing fancy back. YEAH.)

(Just sing that like J.T. would do. It's a lot funnier.)

Xoxo,

Courtney

Man...

2010-09-07T01:03:00.000-04:00

it feels good to be a gangsta.

And it's great to be back in Rexburg.

It took me a couple of days to get excited but everyone is getting settled in and back into town. It makes me feel all warm and fuzzy on the inside.

More to come soon.

xoxo,

Courtney

Why-o-ming.

2010-09-03T23:22:00.000-04:00

Chinese myth? No. It's really a place. Once upon a time Wyoming was just a state on the map. I thought to myself, "Who lives in Wyoming?" Well, I guess a few people do. Mainly of the cowboy nature. I have now been to Wyoming and graced a few hotel/motel options here as well. Wyoming isn't so much of a mystery place to me nowadays. It's only a couple of hours away.

I always wondered what the difference between a "hotel" and "motel" was (other than the price) and I think I've come to a solid conclusion. My ever-so-generous brother in law who is a regular traveler for his job had some points racked up with Holiday Inn so I am writing to you from the comforts of my nice, quiet, dry bed. I throw dry in there for good reason. Motel 6 in Iowa City -- WET. The rooms were damp. I'm not exaggerating this in the slightest. It kind of blew my mind how everything was wet. (Allow me to flashback to one of my favorite scenes from "The Proposal" where they run into each other naked: "BUT I DON'T UNDERSTAND! WHY ARE YOU WET??) Precisely my question indeed Motel 6! The floors, sheets, pillows...they all had a dampness. AP didn't believe me at first, but the next morning he even realized that everything was in fact, wet. I digress. (Got myself on a little tangent there...)
Last night we stayed at a Super8 Motel. The beds, comfortable. The service, adequate. Complimentary breakfast, carb city but they had one of those flip over waffle makers and some peanut butter and honey so I couldn't complain too much. I thought it was pretty decent (definitely overpriced though). Then we get to the Holiday Inn. The staff wears uniforms, the beds have wood furniture and towels big enough to cover your whole body. There is a business center, restaurant and bar and room service. There we go folks. Room service makes the difference. Uniforms and polite, friendly service makes a difference. I now know the difference between motel and hotel. I'm not sure if for one night's stay it would be worth the extra cash to stay in a hotel vs. a motel, but I do know that I would at least feel like I might be getting my money's worth at a hotel. I feel like most motels are kind of a rip off.
So tomorrow I'll be back in Rexburg. Ah, Rexburg, Idaho. I'm excited to see friends and to get back to some sort of normalcy and schedule. I still feel a little sad about leaving, but it wasn't as bad today as it was yesterday. Things are starting to feel good again. I will see mountains tomorrow. I'm thrilled about that.

This month is National Yoga Awareness month! I can tell you that I ♥ Yoga and I recommend it to everyone. It is not just a workout for the mind, but for the soul. That is definitely one of my favorite things about it. I always feel so energized and strong when I am done. Have you done your yoga? :)

There are FREE yoga classes being offered all month long at various gyms throughout the United States. Click the link to find out more!

National Yoga Awareness Month

Namiste,

Courtney

Back to reality.

2010-09-02T23:40:00.001-04:00

Indiana. Check.
Illinois. Check.
Iowa...almost check.

So the adventure begins again. I am currently sitting in my hotel room in a little town called Stuart, Iowa (just west of Des Moines). I would take pictures, but frankly, it all looks the same. The one cool thing about Iowa are the windmills. My pictures would scarcely do them justice. I just copied a picture from google that gives you a better idea. On the way out here, AP and I saw some windmill blades being transported on semi trucks. They are the biggest things I've ever seen.

Beautiful, no?

Leaving Indiana was a different feeling than any other time before. Maybe it's because I started getting used to being "home" again. As we drove further and further away, I felt like a bit of my heart stayed there this time. It was my longest visit home since my venture out west, so perhaps it was expected to settle into my hometown's beautiful landscapes and warm feelings of family and friends. I miss everyone already. I'm looking forward to returning again for another visit. No matter where I go or what I experience in my life, Indianapolis will always been home. It will always be where I learned to walk, ride a bike, drive a car, get my first job, graduate from high school, where my family is, where my mother is buried, where I have experienced so many things.

As I return back to Idaho, I do so with the excitement of seeing friends who have become near and dear to my heart. I do so with knowing that everyday I will get to hear and experience music. This break has once again given me time to reflect and re-adjust my perspective and my goals and desires for the semester. I have a few pictures from the break, but I really need a new camera.

Here were some highlights (in no particular order I assure you):

Going to Ohio to see my sister. "Tookies and Aunt Tortney"
Spending the day with my Dad. I learn more from him and about him all the time. I love it.
Seeing Hunter and Allyson sleeping every night when I came home. Hugging them whenever I wanted and seeing them on the first day of school. I can't imagine what I will feel when I have children of my own to love because I know how much I love them...
Being able to spend time with Adam. The Mach 1, seeing (and hearing up close!) a drag car for the first time, MotoGP, late night redbox movies, Southeastway Park, Sailboats at Eagle Creek, The IMA and the baby deer with her mom, The urban garden downtown, Romeo and Ozzy, driving around on 31....the list goes on.
Going hiking at Eagle Creek Park with Charles.
Red Velvet Cheesecake from The Cheesecake Factory. OH. MY. GOSH.
Spending time with Chris and Jennifer.
Seeing Tiffany, Lana, and Tammy.
Going to the cemetery to see my mom's grave for the first time in 12+ years.
Sleeping in :)
Reading Eat. Pray. Love. (which I finished on the drive today! Loved it!)
Walking the canal.

The list could go on and on, but those things stuck out in my mind. I'm sorry to all those that I didn't see. It isn't because I didn't want to or because you aren't important. Honestly, I sometimes feel like the time went by SO fast. No time at all and it was done. Back to reality I guess.

Love,

Courtney

Hey Dad!

2010-08-31T12:33:00.000-04:00

Today is my Dad's 61st Birthday. Happy Birthday Dad!

He is my biggest fan (and my 2nd biggest critic next to myself), he is my #1 supporter and I love him more than I'll ever be able to say.

Being so far away from my family is certainly the biggest downfall to living across the country.

Here are some fun facts about my Dad and some reasons why I love him so much!

He was born in 1949 to Fredrick and Patricia Rosemeyer.

He will be retiring next year from the Indiana State Excise Police. He has been there since 1974!

I'm convinced he has a bottomless pit of knowledge regarding sports. Any sport. Even curling. (Okay maybe not curling...but I wouldn't put it past him.)

He owns more CD's and music than I will probably ever own or imagine to own. His favorite band is by far and wide The Beach Boys but he has a vast collection of many genres of music. (Hm, and his daughter studies music. Interesting.)

He graduated from Ben Davis High School is 1967. I graduated from Ben Davis High School in 2002. (Side note, my mom also graduated from BDHS in 1967.)

He grew up in the same house his entire life on Exeter Ave. in Indianapolis, Indiana. My grandparents were the original and sole owners. That house is still in my family to this very day.

He is a pipe and cigar enthusiast although he doesn't smoke them anymore. (Thank you for that!)

He has a large collection of beer steins. Homage to our German heritage.

Upon entering my parent's house, one thing stands out....books. There are books everywhere. My dad has been a book lover for as long as I can remember. 99% of his books are nonfiction and are related to media, sports, or Indiana history.

I would say his dream job would be to have a radio show. (And he tried to live vicariously through me when I had a radio show in high school. I tried to play Beach Boys as often as I could.)

He is very smart. (Hence all the books!)

He will talk to anyone and isn't shy. (Apple doesn't fall far from that tree, does it?)

Some say he can be a bit intimidating...it must be the cop thing :)

Above all, he's been there for me through everything. He's never missed a concert or game (with exception of me moving to Idaho...but even still, he's made it to two concerts there!) He is the voice in my head always pushing me to better and be the best I can be. Even though I lived with my mom for most of my childhood until she passed away, he never missed an opportunity to be there for me.

I love you!

Lt. Michael L. Rosemeyer

Love always,

Courtney

Time.

2010-08-31T11:57:00.000-04:00

Time.
To tell you the truth.
To burden your mouth for what you say.
No pieces of paper in the way.

'Cause I can't continue.
Pretending to choose.
These opposite sides on which we fall.
The loving you laters, if at all.

No right minds could wrong be, this many times.

My memory is cruel.
I'm queen of attention to details.
Defending intentions if he fails.

Until now, he told me her name.
It sounded familiar in a way.
I could of sworn I heard him say it ten thousand times...
oh, if only I had been listening.

Leave unsaid, unspoken.
Eyes wide shut, unopened.
~~You and me.~~
~~Always between the lines.~~

I thought I, thought I was ready to bleed.
That we'd move from the shadows on the wall.
Stand in the center of it all.

Too late, two choices, to stay or to leave.
Mine was so easy to uncover.
He'd already left with the other.
So I learned to listen through silence.

Leave unsaid, unspoken.

Eyes wide shut, unopened.

~~You and me.~~

~~Always between the lines.~~

I tell myself all the words he surely meant to say.

I talk until the conversation doesn't stay on.

Wait for me, I'm almost ready when he meant let go.

Leave unsaid, unspoken.

Eyes wide shut, unopened.

~~You and me.~~

~~Always between the lines.~~

Lyrics by: Sara Bareilles.

She's a gem. I love her. Great, great song.

What would you like to forget?

2010-08-31T00:59:00.002-04:00

One of my blogs so conveniently displayed on the right hand of your computer screen is called One Minute Writer. I basically like the idea that you should spend at least one minute a day to write something. She even gives you topics! So today's topic was something you would like to forget. What an interesting question. Does forgetting mean that something else would change? I'm not sure.

So here it is for today: I would like to forget how mad I was about 1 hour ago.

That's all I'll say about that. My one minute is up.

Your turn. What would you like to forget? Just take a minute.

As always...

Health and Happiness,

Courtney

I think I found one I like!

2010-08-30T19:39:00.002-04:00

I think I found a design I like finally. Shout out to Matt for helping me fix some things that I didn't like. I have expanded my knowledge of html through this experience. Hooray for being technological saavy!

Xoxo,

Courtney

Cilantro Lime Shrimp w/ portabella mushrooms

2010-08-28T10:16:00.002-04:00

I made this for the AP and I last night. It was good. It's another Courtney original. This dish was inspired by leftover cilantro and lime from a bean salad. I should probably share that recipe too someday.

Enjoy!

Ingredients:

Shrimp (cooked, peeled, and all that jazz)
3 medium portabellas (cut into strips)
A generous handful of chopped fresh cilantro (that's a handful AFTER chopping)
Lime juice (about half a lime's worth)
Salt
Pepper (be generous with the pepper..it adds a little heat to the meal)
A dash of lemon pepper seasoning
1/2 small white onion
EVOO

In a skillet on medium - med high heat, sweat out the chopped onion in some extra virgin olive oil until it's translucent but not brown. Add cut portabellas and add a little more EVOO. Let the mushrooms and onions cook down a bit. Season with salt, pepper, and lemon pepper. Add cilantro. Add shrimp. Squeeze lime juice into pan. If you get an watery-ness from adding the shrimp crank up the heat and let the excess water cook off. Cook all ingredients together for a bout 5 minutes or so and let the flavors all hang out together. Serve over brown rice!

If you try it, let me know how it went and what you think.

♥ xoxo ♥ Health and Happiness

Court

Just in time to leave.

2010-08-25T22:23:00.003-04:00

Of course. I knew this would happen. Just when I am getting ready to go back to Idaho, I start getting comfortable in Indiana. Don't get me wrong. I am thrilled to see friends and get back to school because frankly, being a bum isn't my style for too long. All in all though, I am loving the fact I can see my babies (nieces and nephews) whenever I want. See my family in general whenever I want. Honestly, I feel like I wasted some time when I first got home. Did I? Maybe the time just went by too quickly.

Today was great. And by great, I really mean great! I got up before 10am which made me happy. I found a really great pair of running shoes at a great bargain!

They are basic shoes, but hey, gotta start somewhere! And these shoes are dedicated to running.

The bf (best friend) and I went on some rad adventures today. Okay, well nothing too spectacular but I did get to see a drag car go down the strip! The day was ended by watching the sunset at one of my favorite places in all of Indianapolis...Eagle Creek. There were so many sailboats out tonight!! It was incredible! I get lost in the water sometimes. I don't mean that literally, I mean that figuratively. I can stare at the water for what seems like hours and completely lose myself. I love having that so close by to take advantage of. I do love my Indiana home. There is no doubt about that. I still have two more years in Idaho and who knows what those two years will bring. I wish I could say I have my life planned out but if there is something I've learned from trying to plan my life, is that life simply cannot be planned. You can dream, you can aspire, and you can have goals, but at the end of the day, life is still moving along. Sometimes you have to roll with the punches.

To a totally different topic, I have made the decision to no longer eat red meat or pork. I think eventually I will make my way towards vegetarianism, but chicken and fish have lower cholesterol levels overall and are not as bad as red meat and pork. It will not be easy, but I feel that it will be very worth it.

♥ ♥ xoxo ♥ ♥ Court

If guys were like girls and vice versa.

2010-08-22T20:50:00.002-04:00

Kind of finding these hilarious.

Here's the girl's version.

Flied Rice.

2010-08-20T11:08:00.003-04:00

Let me start by saying that my least favorite thing about Idaho and Utah is their lack of good chinese food. Some house special lo mein is sometimes just what the doctor ordered but it is hard to find anywhere in Idaho or Utah that has any lo mein that is up to par.

Ah, but I am in Indiana. An abundance of cheap and great chinese food is nearly every mile. Fantastic! Last night, I ventured to the all encompassing Chinese buffet. A few questions arise from my experience there. Before I dive into that however, I thought I'd share that when I was little, I used to go to the China Buffet with my mom and we always went to the same one. I was obsessed with wonton soup and the little crunchy chinese noodles. So my mom would get the buffet, and I would get soup. The owners of the restaurant caught on and got to the point where they wouldn't even charge us for my soup. How nice :) (BTW, I think soup was my go to food as a child...soup with lots of crunchy things in it.)

So we ventured to the buffet. It was 9pm so it's always "risky", as Charles put it, to go to a buffet so late at night. The food has been sitting out for who knows how long. Everything looked fresh so we decided to jump in head first.

Question number one: Why do we need new plates EVERY time we go back to the buffet? I know it is for sanitary reasons, but what are those reasons? So I googled it. Of course. Google knows everything right? Okay, well actually, us smart humans know things that the Google search engine finds and Voila. Here's what I got: if you take a dirty plate back up to the buffet line, there is risk for you contaminating the food. Okay. Makes sense I guess.

Question number two: Did you know that french fries, fried zucchini, texas toast, and chicken nuggets are chinese food! They seem to be on every chinese buffet I go to and this one is no different. I enjoy the fact that I can get some beef and broccoli with a side of french fries. That's America folks.

So, that was my lovely night at the China Buffet. YUM.

PS. Ham should never be an ingredient in chinese food. Ever.

Pink.

2010-08-19T12:34:00.003-04:00

I love the color pink. Obviously my blog is pink. I'm a girl and I took ballet classes for years so pink is just instilled in my very little girly soul. My phone is pink. My bookbag is pink. I have a LOVE PINK bag from Vicki's. My toes are normally pink. I wouldn't be opposed to driving a pink car. As I was skyping with a good friend last night, he looked behind me and said, "Is that a pink wall and hello kitty in the background?!" I showed him my niece's room (which is very pink) and he exclaimed, "What a perfect place for you to be staying in! It's pink! You love pink!" I do, in fact, love pink. So, I found this picture and it just about sums it up.

For the record, I also love purple. And blue.

♥ xoxo ♥ Court

Zen like state of mind.

2010-08-18T12:47:00.003-04:00

Okay so maybe I'm not completely in a zen like state of mind, but I feel like I'm starting to discover something quite close to that. I've meditated before but lately I've been starting each day with a meditation and prayer (as well as some reading) and I can tell you that it is making a difference in my day.

Last night I took a walk along the canal downtown with a friend. We stopped at the opposite end to sit and talk. I'll admit our conversation wasn't exactly inspiring. I won't divulge his personal life on my blog but I will say that he said something to me and a wall went up. As soon as it did, I fell into an almost trance like state where I just sat, completely oblivious to him and any other noise around me and fell completely in awe of the water sparkling next to me. I watched as it danced like one of those pretty fireworks at 4th of July on the water. I wasn't upset. I was simply content. I thought how much I missed the city and how beautiful my surroundings were at that moment. I thanked God for allowing me the opportunity to be where I was at that very moment. I had no desire to speak. My thoughts continued to wonder and I allowed myself to feel completely peaceful. This has been happening more and more for me throughout my days and it is amazing. I'm not saying I'm some zen master but I am saying that my level of contentment with my life has definitely shifted. It continues to do so everyday.

One thing I am struggling with, however, is the fact that I am able to do whatever I want with my time. This kind of freedom makes me a bit nervous at times. I don't use an alarm clock to wake up and I am able to do whatever I want, whenever I want. I don't think it is in our nature to wonder aimlessly in this life. We were given a purpose and we need to fulfill those purposes. By praying and meditating each morning, I have at least been able to gain some direction on what to do with my days. That is a good thing. I can choose to follow it or ignore it, of course. Free agency is scary. When you put our agency under the magnifying glass, it is interesting to think about how many choices we make in a day. When we have jobs or families to attend to, those give us reasons to make choices. I have neither of those that I am obliged to currently. I do have a jury at school that I need to prepare for, but other than that, I honestly have no obligations to anyone or anything than God. What an interesting feeling.

With that said, there is an orchard that has been calling my name. It is a beautiful day outside and I cannot wait to go partake in it's beauty!

xoxo
Court

Goat cheese.

2010-08-17T13:15:00.003-04:00

I would like to publicly declare my love for goat cheese.

In particular, goat cheese infused with herbs.

I would like to thank the goat cheese for adding a refreshing flavor to my salad.

Once again. I ♥ goat cheese.

Not a cloud in the sky.

2010-08-16T13:40:00.003-04:00

FINALLY.

There are no clouds today. It's not 95 degrees outside. I actually was able to lay out and read for an hour or so and get some sun. It was heaven.

Not to toot my own horn but I also got up this morning and started my morning with what should be a morning ritual of prayer and scripture study. I will admit I have been somewhat lacking in the consistency of this ritual. However, I am striving to find it a daily habit. When I have time off from busy-ness, namely school, I try to utilize that time to do a bit of self discovery and cleansing. It normally takes a couple of weeks of silly idleness on my part to do anything worth while to discover or re-dedicate myself, but I am finally finding my path again and my backdrop is my Indiana home.

There are so many things in this world that I want to do, but I think I'm finally on to the idea that it is not up to me all of the time. There are a lot of things that need to be done. Let me go out on a limb and say that I feel somehow there can be a universal balance between the two. As long as the universe and I can come to an understanding that what I want to do and what needs to be done can be mutually agreed upon.

I choose to follow the creeds and doctrines of Mormonism because in my life, they have stood the test of time and the truthfulness of their messages stand the test of time. My relationship with God and His universe have led me there. However, although I do have strong convictions regarding the truthfulness of my faith, I have complete and utter respect for others who are seeking a pure and happy walk with Our Creator the same as I am. I feel that they will be rewarded the same for their pursuits. I want to make myself clear in the fact that the reason I chose to be baptized into the LDS faith was because I received a distinct and clear revelation to do so after a sincere and heartfelt prayer. It is not an easy road, but it has been a journey that so far has led me to some of the most peaceful and spiritual experiences in my life. I know it will continue to do so. I used to live in a world full of worry and fear. Of course I still sometimes worry, and I also sometimes fear, but there is so much LESS worry and so much MORE faith and hope than ever before present in my life.

Today I sat outside soaking up the sun (and vitamin D! Hooray for nutrients!) and listened to nature. I was reading a book and enjoying that too, but just to be outside in the world. I would stop reading for a few moments and look around and my whole body was still. My mind was still. Unfortunately, it can take a lot of time and practice alone to learn how to still your mind, but I have found that it can transcend into my everyday life. My mind, although thinking and processing, is maintaining a sense of stillness. It's a truly beautiful thing.

I could keep going on about how I loved watching the blades of grass and admiring their shapes and gorgeous green colors. I could go on about how perfectly blue the sky is and how the tree line contrasted against them in their majesty. The closest feeling I could describe it with would be how I feel when I'm sitting in the celestial room of the temple.

What would we do if we were not governed by time and to do lists? What would be achieve if we were able to engage ourselves in our truest and most honest desires of our souls? Would this world transform into do-gooders? Would we swallow all fear? Would we live in grass huts or mansions? Who is to say that we can't try this in our lives now? Who is forcing us to do things we don't feel are within our natures? What is one word that can describe us? One word that's definition is all encompassing of ourselves?

It's a lot to think about. It's great material for mediation.

So I'll go back to that now.

Oh and have you ever peeled a blueberry and looked at it? Try it.

Rain, rain go away.

2010-08-14T15:14:00.002-04:00

Spending a Saturday poolside (and by poolside, I mean a 3 feet deep kiddie pool in my sister's backyard). But I love it.

Heading back to Indiana tomorrow from the O-H-I-O.

I'm currently reading Eat.Pray.Love. right now and I just finished the "eat"ing section. So far, I love it. It is so inspiring and so up my alley. I want to finish the book before I go see the movie but the movie came out this weekend so I need to get crack-a-lackin' on this book. I still have to read about India and Indonesia. I'll have time tomorrow on the drive back. Does reading make anyone else a sleepyhead? I swear I can't read a book without falling asleep.

I'm also currently entertained by my 2.5 year old niece Charleigh as she eats her strawberries and chicken nuggets. She's hilarious. Gotta love kiddies. She calles me "Aunt Tortney".

Inspiration.

2010-08-11T19:46:00.012-04:00

This is my background on my desktop now. It incorporates just a few of the things that I love and inspire me. Dance. Music. Exercise. Yoga.

Om....

GORGEOUS bedroom.

A beautiful kitchen.

My favorite magazine! Seriously. You should see my face when I see the new issue on the stand at the grocery store. I'm like a little kid who just farted for the first time.

Journal Obsessed.

2010-08-11T12:58:00.001-04:00

I think I want to start collecting journals. I'm slightly obsessed with them. And I promise I'll write in every one!

A little dose of motherhood and countryside.

2010-08-10T23:43:00.003-04:00

While I'm back home in Indiana for a few weeks, I'm staying with my oldest sister and her family. She has two kids: Allyson (Ally) who is 7 and is in 2nd grade and Hunter, 5, and starting his first day of kindergarten in the morning! My sister also woke up this morning with a fever of 101.9 and swollen glands and a very sore throat. Doc says it's strep. A couple of weeks ago, I watched the kids during the day and got a taste of what it's like to cater to their every whim. There is a selflessness that comes with taking care of children. It certainly takes patience. Tonight, I picked them up from the babysitter's, gave them a snack, did homework with Ally, made dinner, gave the kids a bath, and put them to bed. It definitely has it's moments for sure, but I can see why mom's love their kids so much. Mother's are so important.

Jennifer's doctor is out in a little town called New Palestine, Indiana. As I was driving her there, we were driving past all of the fields of corn and I remembered how much I love Indiana. I love the country in general. Who would have thought that me, a little suburb girl, would have fallen in love with the idea of a house with a wrap around porch in the middle of the country? Who would have thought that I would dream of gardening gloves and fresh vegetables, four wheelers, and living where it's quiet and peaceful. I love the hustle and bustle of the city as well, but I have realized that I sleep better and breathe easier when I'm out in the country. Maybe that's a personal metaphor. From the outside it looks like bright lights and fast paced, but on the inside, when you really truly understand me, it's fields and star filled skies - perfectly quiet and peaceful. There is one other place I've been that I would probably want to live just as much as an Indiana countryside, and that is in the mountains of Idaho. My friend Charlie's house is one of the most amazing houses I've ever seen. It sits up in a mountain side. There are more stars in the sky than you'll ever see anywhere else. It's almost like you can reach out and touch them. They have a huge garage for projects, a giant garden, a root garden for potatoes, carrots and whatever other root vegetables tickle your fancy. Not to mention space. And the kitchen window is a perfect picture of the mountains across the way. It's fabulous. Simply fantastic.

Perhaps I should stop dreaming and focus on the here and now but let's be honest, it's fun to dream! I will have my dream someday.

What are your dreams?

xoxo Court

Shop it.

2010-08-08T20:58:00.004-04:00

I might have an addiction to shopping.

I said might.

Luckily I have no credit cards in my possession. If I did, it could be a dangerous situation. You see, for quite a few years, I was too fat to wear anything cute at the stores that I liked the most. When you wear a size 20 and XXL, it's not the easiest. But now, I am in a L/XL top and 13/14 pants! I would still like to get down to my goal size which is an 8 (but let's be honest, I'd be thrilled in a 10). Anywho, I love to buy clothes now. I still don't always love the way I look in everything, but it's a definite improvement!

So, I think I get this habit honestly. From my father. He's quite the shopper himself. He has 34 pairs of shoes! I counted! Well, the other day as a some father/daughter bonding, we went up to the mall on the north side of Indy. It's a pretty fancy little mall. They have an Anthropologie store and I FELL IN LOVE. I bought two journals (because I'm slightly obsessed with journals) and I'm currently using this one.

I wish I could show you the inside because it is just my absolute favorite thing ever! There are five pages per day. There is a doodle page, a couple of pages for notes, etc. and there is even a money tracking page! Not to mention, a to-do list page. Seriously, so. much. fun. Not to mention there are stickers in the back!! Who doesn't love stickers?! (Yes, I'm 26 and I still love stickers.)

I also purchased this journal/book which I enjoy very much as well.

The front covers do neither of these books justice, but if you're in an Anthropologie store or you run across them, look at them. They are both very different but so unique and beautiful.

I finally broke down and bought a couple pairs of shorts and capris. I can't wear them on campus so I sometimes can't justify buying them, but my sister threatened to cut off my jeans. What's a girl to do?!

Happy shopping :)

Peace and health.

Court

Prop 8 and Marriage.

2010-08-04T20:44:00.003-04:00

I promise I try to avoid political ramblings as much as possible, but see as it is thunderstorming like crazy outside and I don't really have anything better to do with my time, I think I'll talk a minute to share my opinion.

First thing first, I hope not offend anyone. Secondly, my opinion has nothing to do with the fact I'm Mormon. Although my knowledge of the Bible and other things have shaped my thoughts. I digress.

I'm not really sure how I feel about all of this "unconstitutional" business. I'm so tired of people fighting about it. First of all, being gay is starting to become a fad. For some people, it's legit and that's how they feel most comfortable living their lives. For others, it's just something to do. Even the gay community, I'm sure, can agree. But instead of legalizing gay "marriage" and allow them the same "rights" as married couples, why can't we legalize civil unions for gays and allow them to be in a civil union under the State. But marriage is an act performed before God. It is a covenant with God. And if you're telling me that God accepts homosexual behavior (mind you homosexuality is a personality trait, it is NOT a race) than simply put, it's wrong. God is a loving God, but He also hates sin. ANY sin. Homosexual behavior is a sin, as is every other type of behavior associated with sex before marriage. The thing that bothers me, is in reality, homosexual lifestyles are against the nature of the human race. There are so many studies that show that homosexuality runs in families and that there are certain environmental triggers that can push someone who might be "on the fence" with homosexual behaviors running to the other side. I'm not saying I hate anyone who is gay or have any problem with them living their lives. What I do disagree with is the fact that gays want to be treated like there is nothing different about them. The fact is, that's just not true. It is not "normal" to have sex with someone of the same sex. If it was, then the parts would fit where they are supposed to. It's not like homosexuality just came into existence. It has been around for a long time, but it was looked down upon because it is morally wrong and was not normal. It is still morally wrong and not normal. I understand that many homosexuals feel they are born that way and that they have no control over how they feel, and that is fine with me, but that doesn't mean they should be an exception to the rule. If you're born blind, you're not going to live the same life as someone who has their sight. Should we allow them driver's licenses because the seeing people can drive?! Certainly not. I'm tired of the gay community wanting "special" rights to be like everyone else. If you have to get "special" exceptions, then that's a red flag that it's not what is in our innate nature as human beings.
The gay community is a faction. That is really what it boils down to. If you study politics and understand the beginning of the constitution and how factions were part of the reason we MADE a constitution, you would see that our nation was founded on Christian principles and the freedom of religion. Most of our forefathers would turn over in their graves if they saw they way we handle situations now. The men who were considered liberals were those who thought we shouldn't be under the rule of king and that business should be handled in a different manner. They weren't men who wanted to abuse and pervert the human family. They were men who went to Church every Sunday and most of them all practiced similar religions. Most were protestant.

I know I might get a lot of flack for my beliefs, and I don't hate anyone for the way they live their lives. I just wish people would stop trying to ask for special rights because they are different. We all have to adapt to our differences. I can try to pee standing up, but that doesn't mean it's right or should be accepted by everyone. I'm a woman. I pee sitting down.

Being me.

2010-08-03T13:57:00.005-04:00

Oh hello. It has been quite some time. I'm pretty sure I start every entry off in this manner nowadays.

I'm back in Indiana for a few weeks as I am on a break from school. You know what I have decided? I'm not sure what my purpose is with this blog. Do I want to use it for blabbing on about my life, or do I want to discuss things that I don't understand or things that are important to me? Or can I do both? Either way, when I have a break from school it seems that I find myself trying to regroup and get back to who I want to be and on that list, I would like to say that I am a good writer. However, in order to do so, I should probably write.

Alas. I write.

As previously mentioned, I am back in my home state. Hoosier country. Can I be blunt? I was looking forward to coming home until my hair started to frizz and I realized that Rexburg had somehow captured a place in my heart. I often feel so torn when I come home. This time is no different. And I still cannot decide how I feel about one place or the other. So until I figure that out, I shall remain confused.

It is nice to be with family and it is nice to see old friends and play around in the city a bit. I babysat Allyson and Hunter last week for a few days. Holy selflessness batman. That's probably the biggest dose of motherhood I have ever had and I must say, wow. I commend all mothers out there. Especially single mothers or mothers who have husbands who are away a lot. I'm staying with my sister, Jennifer while I'm in town. Jen and I have never been super tight so I'm glad to have the chance to stay here. She's nine years older than me and unlike Jaime and I, we were never forced to bond. Jaime and I shared a room growing up at my dad's house when I would come over to visit, so inevitably, we became close as time went on. The kids are at day care all day, and Jen and Chris are at work, so I'm just all by my lonesome until I find some sort of shennanigans to get myself into. The weather has been less than desirable for tanning purposes, but I'll deal with it.

Over the past few weeks/months I have been inconsistent with my desire to be more healthy. It comes and goes and I teeter-totter back and forth. There are so many aspects of my life that are working in the direction I want them to, yet I still struggle with this one area. I constantly push myself to be better, as I believe we all should, yet sometimes I have to accept defeat and start over again the next day. I know we all do it. Have you ever wanted something so bad but you feel no matter what you do, it's out of reach? Now, I'm not saying that I'm giving up on anything, but man oh man, I have my work cut out for me.

I feel like I'm very diverse in my topic choices today. So I apologize for that. :)

I sang last night for the first time since school. I performed up at Morty's Comedy Club on the north side of Indy. Got 2nd place in a talent competition. I was beat by an old man in a wheelchair doing "sit down" comedy. My dad reminded me that someone in a wheelchair isn't really capable of stand-up comedy. It made me laugh. He was a funny old man, that's for sure. And I definitely am not in the Mormon bubble anymore. HA! I heard more swear words last night in 2 hours than I've heard in the last 1.5 years. One aspect of my life that I'm happy to be grounded in is music. It just fits.

Which reminds me, if you haven't seen it on facebook or youtube, I competed in a campus wide singing competition at school and I WON. Here is a video of my last performance. Enjoy! :)

Peace and happiness to you all. ♥
Court

Oh-pera.

2010-06-12T11:12:00.000-04:00

Saturday morning. 9:12am.
Opera Rehearsal.
Undecided feelings.

You look like him.

2010-05-18T00:42:00.002-04:00

There is a boy here on campus that I've become well acquainted with this semester that one day looked eerily familiar. Now every time I see him, I see a little bit of you. I don't know what to make of it or what to think of it. I just know that your blue eyes could look straight through me and I sometimes think his do too.

I miss your blue eyes.

Anthony Fordyce was my first real boyfriend and also my first "I love you". He was a first a lot of things. He was my first real kiss. My first real date. My first fight. My first break up. We barely talked through high school after we had broken up. Then one day, out of the blue, three years after we had left high school, his voice was on the other end of my home phone. We became good friends again and he even lived with me for a while (just as a roommate....but I'd be lying if the idea of more never crossed my mind). In October of 2008, Anthony was found dead in his apartment from an overdose on pain killers. I will never forget that day. His life was cut short all too soon. Now, I see him everytime I look at this guy at school and I just don't know what to do with it. I was just thinking about it though....and I needed to get that out in the air.

ProClean Services of Rexburg

2010-05-15T22:06:00.002-04:00

Guess what? I finally put in some grunt work and started my own little business. I've been trying to figure out a way to do my own business for a while now and finally I thought " Hm....everyone who goes to school here has to have clean checks...not to mention people just don't like to clean...sooooo" Vòila! ProClean Services of Rexburg has been born. I have done some decent marketing and hope that it pays off. I'll give you a little scoop of some of my marking flyers so you can see! I made them myself! So, if you know anyone in the Rexburg area who needs some cleaning, let me know!

Being sick cramps my style.

2010-05-11T13:20:00.003-04:00

Although being sick does give me some time to catch up on my blog.

This semester is nothing short of CRAZY. I'm taking 16 credits, participating in the Opera, volunteering as a peer facilitator for life skills workshop series, and am mentoring a student for the Heber J. Grant scholarship program. Oh, and I'm still trying to find a job. Ha! I'm trying to get a job on campus with the music department, so at least it would be close to home and related to something I'm doing.

Despite my best efforts of getting enough sleep, taking a vitamin everyday, exercising, and eating healthy, my body decided to be sick. So, I slept in this morning, got some collodial silver at the recommendation of my vocal coach, drank a warm cup of herbal echinecha tea and made myself a smoothie. Don't worry, I put a link to the recipe for you.

So needless to say, I've been a busy girl. I also had a birthday a couple of weeks ago. Twenty-six. I'm still not sure how I feel about it. I'm okay with my age, but often times I forget that I am so much older (and of course, wiser) than most of my peers. I'm still crazy silly me, but with a little bit less.....something. I'm not really sure what that something is other than the fact that I think I've actually grown up a little bit and started taking some responsibility for myself nowadays.

My camera is broken so unfortunately, I don't have a lot of exciting pictures to post. I have a camera phone, but that's kind of lame. I have a camera on my computer, but mainly I just take little headshots of myself. :) I have a Mac now and I'm in love with it. Seriously, seriously in love with it. I guess for your entertainment, I will post some recent silly shots of myself. The first one obviously isn't silly....but I thought it was necessary so you remember that I don't look like a headless or crazy maniac.

Health and Happiness to all :)

Court

New Recipe Up at Naturally Good!

2010-05-11T13:19:00.000-04:00

http://naturallygoodbycourtney.blogspot.com/

Smoothie Recipe

Mother's Day

2010-05-09T23:14:00.002-04:00

You were there for me when I could be there for myself.
You understood every angle, every cry, every laugh.
You knew my smile and every feature of my face.
You knew me before I knew me.
You loved me more than I could ever give you credit for,
And even in your death I understand that no one can ever replace your love.
You taught me about life and you taught me about laughter.
You brushed my hair ever so gently.
I smile and laugh just the same as you.
When I look at your pictures frozen in time, I can almost hear your voice.
I know I can hear your laugh. I can see your beautiful face.
Thank you for giving me a life I never knew I could have.
You're never gone forever. You allowed me to move on and be happy despite your absence.
You were and forever will by my mother.
You're never forgotten, never forsaken and never taken for granted.
Happy Mother's Day.
I'll see you someday.

---------------

Thirteen years have gone by and even though I still cry at least once every Mother's Day, but they have become softer tears and sometimes even joyful tears. God has a plan and I trust in it. I could ask why for the rest of my life, but sometimes we cannot become who we want to be without a push or something to challenge us to our very core. I have fought and battled and I am happy to say that I am each day becoming a better, stronger, happier woman. I am, no doubt, someone that my mother (and my father) can be proud of. Together they have taught me many things. My mother instilled in me the ability to show unconditional love and my father the inept ability to get up every day and do my best. I'd say I'm very fortunate. Despite her death, I have been able to feel my mother's love carry on. Soon she will finally have a marker on her grave; this, the one thing I have wanted to do for her for thirteen years. No longer will her final resting place be a lonely plot without a name. Anyone who walks by her will know that she is there, and that she was a loving mother. Her posterity can find her and through my life and stories, be able to know the ancestor they might have never known otherwise.

I look forward to being a mother someday. I look forward to teaching and watching my own creation grow and learn and hopefully make this world a more peaceful and beautiful place. (Now, the husband finding part.....that's another journal entry!)

To all the mothers out there, don't forget how important you are. Your children might not even know where to begin in understanding your importance, but I assure you, someday they will and that is all that really matters.

I love you, Mom.

Opera this, opera that.

2010-04-23T12:54:00.003-04:00

So sometimes I get a little frustrated. I remember my first semester at Indiana University...surrounded by divas who couldn't get enough of themselves. Surrounded by guys and girls who wouldn't stop talking about who they studied with and how awesome they are.

In high school, it is safe to say that EVERYONE knew that I sang. Everyone. I also was probably a little more open about it and not afraid to go after I want. I've become a lot less aggressive as a person overall, so I stay under the radar a little bit.

I was super bummed about the fact that I was accepted into Kris Ceiseinski's studio...only to find out that she doesn't have room for me. However, the more I move up in my education, the more I realize that I need to maintain a quiet confidence. I have no desire to be a diva. I'd rather be respected, loved and admired for other things. I was excited to come to a school where I thought that people would be less diva-ish. Well, I've discovered that is not always the case. Still lots of divas. It's kind of annoying.

There are just so many things about being surrounded by Mormons, or people who were raised Mormon....there are just so many things that make me laugh.

Anywho...that's my little tangent. Off to piano class. Ugh.

Semester done? Check!!

2010-04-10T13:04:00.002-04:00

Wow guys. So many great things to tell you about! I don't have tons of time to be writing today, but I wanted to keep you 3 people who read this informed.

First thing first, I'm done with school for another semester!!! Yay for Spring Break!! WHOO!! (Oh and by the way, before I forget I want to mention that I'm typing this little diddy on my new MAC!!! I finally am a Mac owner :) After years of Mac envy, I have one of my very own!! It's a used one, but I don't care! It's great!!! And I got it for a LOT cheaper than a new one would have cost me!) Now that I have that exciting news out of the way....

The semester finished up pretty well over all, minus one little bump of having to retake one class next semester, but oh well. If you fall off the horse, you get up and try, try again, right? But other than that, I'm pulling out solid A's and B's like a good student. I don't know if straight A's will ever be in my future. As long as I pull out solid A's and B's every semester, I can deal. Next semester is going to be INSANE!!!! Seriously, insane in the membrane for sure. But I'm still pumped about it. I'm taking 17 credits, volunteering as a mentor for the Heber J. Grant scholarship program, teaching a life skills workshop, and starting a business!! Crazy huh? I love it.

I am going home to Indiana on Monday for the week. I couldn't be more thrilled about it. I miss my family and friends. I'm so excited to see my Daddy!! And Adam!! And well, just everyone!!

Today is also a special day because one of my dear friends, Breanna, is getting married today! Another one bites the dust. If you're wanting to get married in the next year or so, just become best friends with me. It seems to work! Haha. On a serious note, I am so incredibly happy for her. I think of all of my friends and the weddings I have been able to witness and the special occasions I have been able to be a part of and I feel so very blessed. Due to geography, I haven't been able to witness the births of some of my favorite babies in person, but I love them all so much! I really feel like I need to be better about building relationships with them. I think of my mom and her best friends, some of which are still a part of my life today, and it is so enriching for me. It gives me an opportunity to learn more about my mom that I would never know otherwise. I am so excited to see my friends and their families grow. I am so excited to see where life takes each of us. But I'm just excited to live each day and see what that has to offer as well.

Okay, so anywho, I have some things to finish up.

Love and health,

Courtney

Today...

2010-03-11T00:19:00.001-05:00

was not a day in which I accomplished much.

Let's try again tomorrow, shall we?

Registration

2010-03-10T03:18:00.001-05:00

In order to register for one class you have to go to like five different screens.

But then there is a button that says "drop all classes and withdraw from school".

Well, it's a lot easier to do that than to register. Are they trying to send subliminal messages?

Don't worry...I'll go through the million screens to register.

But still, food for thought. hehe.

Fishbowl

2010-03-08T15:28:00.002-05:00

So I should be looking over my music for my voice lesson that is in 30 minutes, but instead, I figured I needed to update you folks on my oh-so-lovely life.
When is the last time I even updated you? Oh...probably right after Adam and I started talking again. We're still best friends and it's great. He finally has a JOB again!! Congrats Adam! So proud of him :)

So....hm....what's been happening in the world of me? Well, it's been busy, that's for certain. Life is......really great!!! Opera Scenes just finished this past weekend and it was a blast. My favorite part? Teasing my hair a good 6" tall for our MacBeth scenes where I was a witch. It was fantastic. I have a shocking revelation for you. I actually like opera. Better yet, I'm considering actually having a career in it. I was shocked with myself. Who would have thought that I would start to love something after so many years of being so against it!? Next semester I will be *hopefully* studying with Kristine Ciesenski. (Check her out here: ) Her and her husband starting teaching as part time faculty here at BYUI a few years back. She is quite intense and quite intimidating. I figure that she will either make or break me as to whether or not I want to pursue a master's degree in Vocal Performance or if I want to go down another path (perhaps the musical theatre path) for grad school.

School has been going really well this semester. I think it's safe to say that I'm developing into a pretty good little student. There are still areas of improvement to be made, of course, but I do my homework and go to class almost all the time!! Yay me! I made a big decision this week to go on the fast grad program which will make my graduation in December of NEXT YEAR!!!! That means less than two years and I'll have a bachelor's degree! I'm pretty set on this goal...so it will have to take something major to distract me from it now. I'm just so excited to continue growing and learning. I see little improvements in things and have really grown as a musician over the last year.

Also, for the first time in my LIFE, I have been making financial strides and have paid off some major things. It's been so great. I have to say that it hasn't been completely on my own, as I've had some assistance from someone in some areas, but it has been a HUGE blessing to feel financially more secure than I think I ever have since I've been on my own. I'm grateful for PELL GRANTS!!! haha.

There have been other things here and there that have contributed to my pleasant feeling about life, such as having a boyfriend, even despite the fact we are no longer together, we are still friends and he does make me feel really great about myself....it's just too difficult to maintain a long distance relationship and things weren't adding up just right.

I've started to gain a love for flowers in my hair and DownEast clothing.

Well, I need to at least look at my music before I go to my lesson.

Love to you!♥ ♥

Thursday Weigh Ins: Week 1

2010-02-11T23:31:00.002-05:00

Drum roll please!!!!

Here are the results after week one:

Weight: 195

Hip: 45 in
Waist: 44 in
Bust: 44 in

Here are last week's numbers:

Weight: 196 lbs

Hips: 46 in
Waist: 45 in
Bust: 45 in

WHOO HOO!! I only lost 1 (maybe two...my scale isn't the most precise...) pounds but my I've lost an inch EVERYWHERE else!!! That is crazy!

I've really fallen in love with the Yoga workout and I do it daily (with Sunday as my literal day of rest). I've done the Boot Camp workout once and I did enjoy it. As long as I'm doing one or the other, it doesn't really matter.

Health and Happiness!

Courtney

Biggest Loser Workouts

2010-02-04T18:46:00.002-05:00

So today is day one of my new exercise program. I purchased Biggest Loser Bootcamp and Biggest Loser Yoga for Weightloss workout DVD's yesterday. I must say....I got my butt kicked during the yoga workout but it felt AMAZING afterwards. Anywho...I'll keep you posted. I need to start keeping better track again. I'll be 26 in 3 months (omg....) and I would like to weigh 180 by my birthday.

SO.....Thursdays are going to be weekly weigh in days.

Current weight: 196 lbs

Hips: 46 in
Waist: 45 in
Bust: 45 in

Now, considering I weighed 255 lbs two years ago, I'm very happy thus far; however, now is phase two.

Good luck to me! haha.

Oh Heyyyyy

2010-02-04T02:02:00.002-05:00

I must say I have a talent for marrying off best friends. If you want to get married, just be my best friend! LOL. Congrats to Breanna!!! She's getting married! Whoo! It's going to be interesting trying to help plan a wedding in Ohio from Idaho....hm....but I'm excited for her! How fun! I've never seen a temple sealing before so it will be a really cool experience.

Speaking of best friends, I have mine back now:) I'm very blessed to be able to call a few people my best friends. It's a long story that I won't go into details about, but Adam and I didn't speak for two weeks to figure some stuff out. It's been figured out, and we're back to normal. Thank goodness!

I am going to be performing in a Broadway Revue show here on campus next weekend. I am PUMPED UP about it! I get to belt out and be on stage. YESSSSSSS!! Hm...what am I going to wear!? Belting makes me happy. It doesn't make my voice teacher happy, but it makes ME happy! Ha!

I bought some new workout videos from the Biggest Loser...I'm excited to try them. I'll let you know what I think. (I'll probably post that on my other blog though...so you should be reading that too! haha)

Okay, I'm a sleepy girl. Off to bed I go.

What happened yesterday?

2010-01-30T12:35:00.002-05:00

Oh man. Lemme tell ya. Yesterday was an emotional day! It started Thursday night and just rolled it's emotional back on over to Friday for me to enjoy. I think my "Perfectly Lonely" bug got lost and thought it was the "You're going to be alone forever and everyone important in your life leaves you anyways...." bug. Okay, fine. Yes. I'm a tad overdramatic sometimes; however, it was a valid thought so I can justify my behavior. I'm just glad it didn't tidal wave out to where I talked to too many people because mostly, it was just silly. However, I would like to share some of what I experienced yesterday, because I know I can't be completely alone in this endeavor. I'm sure someone out there has had the same feelings.

Going along with this, I think it is safe to acknowledge that I have a hard time losing people (and to psychoanalyze myself, I'm pretty sure it has something to do with losing a parent as a child.) All of my closest friends (okay let's say 95%) that I talk(ed) to on a regular basis in the last 3 years are married or engaged or in serious relationships now. And several of them are moms or dads as well. Guess what happens when that happens? They slowly disappear from my life. I call, I get a voicemail. I call, they are busy. I text, no response back. I call again, they are still busy and I leave another voicemail (sometimes I want to get married just to see what the heck everyone gets so busy with....other that the obvious pun that can be taken from that sentence. You can't have sex all day every day...). Don't get me wrong, I LOVE that they are married and have cute little babies because I get to be the world's coolest aunt to all of them. BUT the selfish side of me kind of resents what it does to my friendships. I keep having to find new friends. I liked my old friends just fine! (Err, no offense new friends...) And here at BYU-"I-DO", dating and getting married are in the everyday jargon of the 18 year old girls and the 21 year old fresh-off-the-mish boys. It makes it difficult to ignore. Not to mention, being 25, overweight and not your traditional LDS girl here at BYU-I doesn't exactly make the dating scene any better. I remember now why I had problems last year....my self esteem kinda takes a hit here.

So, what do I do about it (the obvious answer would be to age backwards and starve myself....wait, no? Wrong answer?)? Well yesterday, I'll admit, I cried and whined about it for half of the day. I was annoyed with life in general. I'll also mention that I am terrible at not being good at something (i.e. playing the piano, sightsinging, and reading syncopated rhythms....) and I had to deal with ALL of those factors yesterday morning. Being a music major is a skilled major, and yes, I know I possess the skills to be a music major, but I have to stretch beyond my capacity to gain more skills and knowledge. I've never been one to stretch myself. I'll try it. Although a word of caution: I might whine and cry more. :) But by the end of the day, I had showered, plopped myself down on the Lovesak in our living room and started doing homework. Fortunately, and unfortunately for my homework, I got invited to hang out with one of those "new friends" I mentioned before...and I ended up having a great night, and my patience kind of paid off in a way.

So that was that. It was emotional, ridiculous, but valid. I can't help the way I feel...but I can learn to cope with it. I can't change my life. It is what it is. I can learn to be happy with it though. I don't really care that I'm not married or don't have kids of my own. That doesn't make me unhappy. I do care about the relationships with my close friends and wish those relationships didn't have to take such a low spot on the todem pole because they have someone else in their No. 1 slot. As I get older, and continue to live a life different from most of my friends (not being married, etc) I will have to find my peace with it. I don't mean to sound bitter. I have a great life. I just miss my friends sometimes.

Has anyone else had to deal with this? How do you cope with it? When a best friend gets married or "moves on" to a different part of their life, where does that leave the friendship? They have a husband, wife or kids to occupy their time. The unmarried best friend, although busy with life, still has flexibility and time to contribute...but it's hard to maintain a relationship with a voicemail. What do we do to adapt to the new situation? Do we email more and talk less? Or do we live in a world where our best friends are just fillers until we find a spouse? Once the spouse is there, what's the need for a best friend? Is that how it works? Does it become burdensome to try and hold on to that old friend? Hm....so many questions.

Let's all let that one marinate and see what we come up with. (Vandi, sidenote, You're probably the busiest woman I know but you are pretty amazing at keeping up with things....and I know you'll be the first one to read and comment on this. I love you for that. And sidenote to anyone else who might be reading this....don't be mad that I gave Vandi props. haha.)

Do I sound like a complaining camel? (Oh yeah, came up with that one all by myself...kind of like quiet coyote, only different.)

Worth Sharing....

2010-01-28T00:28:00.001-05:00

The following is the most recent devotional at BYU-Idaho given by Elder Russell M. Nelson of the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles of the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. For LDS and non-LDS alike, I encourage you to read and ponder these words. I found some of the facts and data particularly interesting. Just goes to show, God has always been and will always be in control.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Brigham Young University-Idaho Devotional
January 26, 2010

Education: A Religious Responsibility
Elder Russell M. Nelson
Quorum of the Twelve Apostles

Thank you President Clark. Sister Wendy Nelson and I are grateful for the privilege of participating with you today at this devotional assembly. President Thomas S. Monson and his counselors as well as my associates in the Quorum of the Twelve Apostles extend our love and greetings to each of you. We and all members of the Board of Trustees express our gratitude to members of the faculty and the staff of this institution. You are dedicated and devoted leaders. And to the students, we express our deep affection and best wishes. We love you! The youth of this Church are part of a chosen generation. You have been foreordained to be leaders in the Church of God. We are honored to be with you.

Tonight Wendy will speak at the Women’s Meeting and I will get to listen to her message. The assignment for me to speak to you this afternoon has come from the First Presidency. If I had my preference, I would hear from each of you. I would like to get to know every one of you. I would like to learn of your faith, of your goals in life, and of your challenges. Not knowing how I could make that happen, I had better be obedient to my leaders and do as they have asked. Please accept my virtual handshake as a sign of my love for each of you.

I am still thinking about your opening hymn. Thank you for your meaningful musical prayer: “As I Searched the Holy Scriptures, loving Father of mankind, may my heart be blessed with wisdom, and may knowledge fill my mind.” [1]

From my heart and mind to yours, I address you on this occasion. Please be true to yourself. Honor—yes, even demand—highest expectations from yourself. Pursue your education as a priority of the highest order. Gain all the education you can. With us as Latter-day Saints, education is a religious responsibility. “The glory of God is intelligence” (D&C 93:36).

Your personal intelligence—your personal identity—is everlasting and divine (see D&C 93:29). I believe that Thomas Jefferson must have felt that dignity and divine nature of the human spirit when he wrote, “I have sworn upon the Altar of God, eternal hostility against every form of tyranny over the mind of man.” [2]

Seek Education

Your mind is precious! It is sacred. Therefore, the education of one’s mind is also sacred. Indeed, education is a religious responsibility. Of course, our opportunities and abilities will vary a great deal. But, in the pursuit of one’s education, individual desire is more important than is the institution you choose; personal drive is more significant than is the faculty.

Our Creator expects His children everywhere to gain an education as a personal endeavor. He issued this commandment: “Seek ye diligently and teach one another words of wisdom; yea, seek ye out of the best books words of wisdom; seek learning, even by study and also by faith” (D&C 88:118; emphasis added). When you leave this frail existence, your material possessions will remain here, but the Lord has declared that the knowledge you acquire here will rise with you in the resurrection (see D&C 130:18–19). In light of this celestial perspective, if you impulsively drop out or otherwise cut short your education, you would not only disregard a divine decree but also abbreviate your own eternal potential.

Each one of you may have had or will yet have your own day of personal commitment—your own scholastic Sacred Grove equivalent. I still remember my moment of resolution. Many years ago, as an untrained teenager, I secured temporary employment at Christmastime. The work was dull, repetitive, and monotonous. Each hour of the day passed slowly. I resolved then and there that I would obtain an education that would qualify me for more meaningful work in my life. I determined that I would become a doctor of medicine.

Many years later, when I was serving both as a medical doctor and a stake president, I chatted with many young people about their personal educational pursuits. Some asked me how long it took to become a doctor of medicine. I replied, “The general pattern would be four years at a university, followed by four years in medical school. And, should you choose to specialize, that could add another five years or more.

My words would often evoke a response like, “You mean . . . ? Why, that adds up to 13 years—and maybe more? That’s too long for me!”

“That all depends,” I would respond. “Preparation for your career is not too long if you know what you want to do with your life. How old will you be 13 years from now if you don’t pursue your education? Just as old, whether or not you become what you want to be!”

So my counsel then—and now—is to continue your education, wherever you are, whatever your interest and opportunity may be. Determine how you can best serve your family and society and prepare well.

Regardless of your personal choice of career, your education is the key. In the process, try to gain wisdom too. Long ago, an important question was asked by Job: “Where shall wisdom be found?” (Job 28:12) Just for a moment, let us focus on his profound question.

Education is a vital component of wisdom. Not long after the pioneers began the construction of their magnificent temple in Illinois, they established the University of the City of Nauvoo. The First Presidency then proclaimed that this university “will enable us to teach our children wisdom, to instruct them in all the knowledge and learning, in the arts, sciences, and learned professions.” [3]

They listed wisdom as a priority and ranked it even before knowledge and learning. Less than three years after the pioneers entered the valley of the Great Salt Lake, they inaugurated the University of the State of Deseret on February 28, 1850. [4] Later, several academies of learning were established with the hope that wisdom could be instilled among their youth.

Beware of Unbalance

While you search for education and wisdom, I need to offer a serious word of caution. Choose carefully what you will learn, whose teachings you will follow, and whose purposes you will serve. And don’t place all of your intellectual eggs in the solitary basket of secular learning. Remember this warning from the Book of Mormon:

“O the vainness, and the frailties, and the foolishness of men! When they are learned they think they are wise, and they hearken not unto the counsel of God, for they set it aside, supposing they know of themselves, wherefore, their wisdom is foolishness and it profiteth them not. And they shall perish.

“But to be learned is good if they hearken unto the counsels of God” (2 Nephi 9:28–29).

That scriptural counsel was not heeded by a rich friend of mine who once proudly boasted that his climb toward wealth had come from tireless work and lessons learned in the “school of hard knocks.” But his financial fortune had come at the expense of his spiritual development. Only when it was too late did he discover, to his regret, that his ladder of success had been leaning against the wrong wall. He had never heeded the following instruction from his Maker:

“Seek not for riches but for wisdom, and behold, the mysteries of God shall be unfolded unto you, and then shall you be made rich. Behold, he that hath eternal life is rich” (D&C 6:7; see also 11:7).

In retrospect, I can now see that mankind’s general and pervasive lack of knowledge of the scriptures has handicapped great numbers of people for long periods of time. The suffering that has resulted from such ignorance is truly tragic. I will illustrate that point with excerpts from history that pertain to the spread of infection from one person to another. [5]

Back in the 19th century, very little was known about the transmission of infectious disease. Health officials and others ascribed infection simply to “air pollution.” They were not concerned about pollution of the air by the visible, smoggy, hydrocarbons of today, but by what they called an invisible miasma. That miasma was blamed for almost every infection. In 1867, for example, the famous surgeon, Lord Joseph Lister, indicted bad air as the chief cause of infection. Because of that notion, in 1869, Dr. J. Y. Simpson of Edinburgh urged a policy that hospitals be taken down and rebuilt every few years. [6] Such a costly practice was also advocated by other experts. [7]

Even Florence Nightingale, a living legend following her heroic efforts in the Crimean War, was unaware of the transmission of infection from one patient to another—this despite her careful notations that wound infection accounted for 40 percent of postoperative mortality. [8] Many others missed the connection, too. For centuries, innumerable mothers and babies died from “childbirth fever”—serious infections unknowingly transmitted among innocent people by the unwashed hands of attendants. [9]

It was only in the latter part of the 19th Century that the great health heroes Robert Koch, Louis Pasteur, and others proved that infection could be caused by bacteria. Infectious organisms in contaminated body fluids were transmitted from one individual to another by attendants who had not washed their hands.

With these painful recollections of history in mind, may I quote the word of the Lord, as recorded long ago in the Old Testament’s book of Leviticus, chapter 15:

“The Lord spake unto Moses and to Aaron, saying,

“Speak unto the children of Israel, and say unto them, When any man hath a running issue [or as we would say, pus draining] out of his flesh, because of his issue he is unclean.

“And this shall be his uncleanness in his issue . . . .

“Every bed, whereon he lieth that hath the issue, is unclean: and every thing, whereon he sitteth, shall be unclean.

“And whosoever toucheth his bed shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water . . . .

“And he that toucheth the flesh of him that hath the issue shall wash his clothes, and bathe himself in water” (Leviticus 15:1–7; emphasis added).

Several verses follow that reemphasize those important instructions. Then we read this conclusion:

“And when he that hath an issue is cleansed of his issue; then he shall . . . wash his clothes, and bathe his flesh in running water, and shall be clean” (v. 13).

Thus, our loving Heavenly Father clearly revealed, and His prophet faithfully recorded, the principles of clean technique in the handling of infected patients more than 3,000 years ago!

These scriptures are in complete harmony with modern medical guidelines. [10] But during those many millennia, how many mothers needlessly perished? How many children suffered because man’s quest for knowledge had failed to incorporate the word of the Lord in that quest?

Contemporary Challenges

In our day, many challenges face us. Some are new, some are old—simply clothed in modern attire. The epistles of Paul include prophecies pertaining to our day. Do these descriptions sound familiar?

“In the last days perilous times shall come.

“For men shall be lovers of their own selves, covetous, boasters, proud, [and the list of insidious qualities goes on] . . .

“Without natural affection, . . .

“Lovers of pleasures more than lovers of God; . . .

“Ever learning, and never able to come to the knowledge of the truth” (2 Timothy 3:1–7).

Paul’s warnings describe these and other dangers of our day. You and I know that many of these threats to happiness are wrong because they are contrary to God’s will. Yet they are championed by persuasive people possessing more ability than morality, more knowledge than wisdom. Their convenient rationalization provides self-consoling justification. But the Bible warns us that “the way of a fool is right in his own eyes” (Proverbs 12:15). Indeed, individuals with ignorance of doctrine, or people with malignity of purpose, often wear the mask of honesty. So we must constantly be on guard.

Presently, many influential people attribute problems of our day to overpopulation. That concept of overpopulation has become broadly believed, and efforts have been made to control birthrates—with regrettable results. For any society to survive, its birth rate must average at least 2.16 births per woman. In the past 50 years, the birthrate has dropped in nearly every nation of the world. In the nations of Europe, the birthrate has dropped from the replacement rate of 2.16 children per woman to the present rate of 1.45. [11] Data from the United States show similar worrisome trends. In 1960, minor children constituted half of the population; now they are only 30 percent. [12] Predictions are that by the year 2025, single-person households in the United States will outnumber families with children. [13]

Meanwhile, the Lord’s command to “be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it” (see Genesis 1:28; 9:1; Moses 2:28; Abraham 4:28) has never been rescinded.

Now, let me ask you a question. Is the world truly overpopulated? Consider the facts. The latest data indicate that the world’s population is 6.8 billion people. If every one of those 6.8 billion people were allocated one quarter of an acre (for example, under that formula a family with a father and a mother with two children would be given one acre), I repeat, if a quarter of an acre were allocated to each man, woman, and child now living on the earth today, they would all fit in the country of Brazil, with 20 percent of Brazil still left unoccupied!

So the real question is, do we have faith in the word of the Lord? He said, “For the earth is full, and there is enough and to spare” (D&C 104:17). God’s work and His glory is to bring to pass the immortality and eternal life of man, and He has provided this earthly opportunity for us to prepare for that glorious goal.

My young brothers and sisters, to build a house straight and strong, you do not choose crooked boards. So to build your eternal destiny, you cannot—you must not—limit your lessons only to those lessons that are warped by the world to exclude the truth from God. The Book of Mormon underlines this note of caution and hope:

“Seek not to counsel the Lord, but to take counsel from his hand. For behold, ye yourselves know that he counseleth in wisdom, and in justice, and in great mercy, over all his works” (Jacob 4:10).

Avoidable deaths and mounting financial burdens are also being incurred worldwide because of indifference to or ignorance of God’s declaration that tobacco “is not good for man” (D&C 89:8). Many other societal problems could be listed, such as alcohol and drug abuse, gambling, pornography, immorality, infidelity, and erosion of family stability. We may know much, and still remain unwise. Where is the knowledge we have lost in obtaining information? And where is the wisdom we have lost in gaining knowledge? [14]

Wisdom Found

Wisdom is to be found in pure intelligence—in that divine light of the gospel which can guide people in all countries, all climes, and all continents. The Lord has promised that “a light shall break forth among them that sit in darkness, and it shall be the fulness of my gospel” (D&C 45:28). Then the Lord lamented:

“But they receive it not; for they perceive not the light, and they turn their hearts from me because of the precepts of men. . . .

“And there shall be men standing in that generation, that shall not pass until they shall see an overflowing scourge; for a desolating sickness shall cover the land.

“But my disciples shall stand in holy places, and shall not be moved; but among the wicked, men shall lift up their voices and curse God and die.

“And there shall be earthquakes also in divers places, and many desolations; yet men will harden their hearts against me” (D&C 45:29–33; see also 87:6).

In contrast to the darkness of such bitter chaos, the bright light of the gospel of Jesus Christ beams as the hope of the world. Missionaries and members courageously proclaim its brilliance. Wise students throughout the world heed its light and enrich their education by adding the curriculum of Church seminaries and institutes. The Lord hides His wisdom from no one. His disciple, James, wrote, “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of God, that giveth to all men liberally” (James 1:5).

Again we consider the question once asked by Job: “Where shall wisdom be found?” (Job 28:12.) The answer: it emanates from the Lord. He declared, “I will give unto the children of men line upon line, precept upon precept, here a little and there a little; and blessed are those who hearken unto my precepts, and lend an ear unto my counsel, for they shall learn wisdom; for unto him that receiveth I will give more” (2 Nephi 28:30).

Divine light and wisdom continue to increase when love for Deity grows: “That which is of God is light; and he that receiveth light, and continueth in God, receiveth more light; and that light groweth brighter and brighter until the perfect day” (D&C 50:24; see also 88:67).

Here is the Lord’s promise to you and to me: “He that keepeth [God’s] commandments receiveth truth and light, until he is glorified in truth and knoweth all things” (D&C 93:28).

Where is wisdom? It pulses and surges in the Lord’s light of truth! With that light, He lifts us toward His glorious goal of eternal life, when we may dwell with Him forever.

Be we again reminded that in our opening hymn we prayed for wisdom and knowledge. Each of us sang, “As I Searched the Holy Scriptures, loving Father of mankind, may my heart be blessed with wisdom, and may knowledge fill my mind.” These blessings granted will provide undergirding and everlasting hope in our hearts.

I know that God lives. Jesus is the Christ. This is His Church. We are His disciples. I leave my testimony, love and blessing with you, in the name of Jesus Christ, amen.

[1] “As I Search the Holy Scriptures,” Hymns, no. 277.
[2] Thomas Jefferson to Benjamin Rush, September 23, 1800, in Elbert D. Thomas, Thomas Jefferson, World Citizen, 1942), 251.
[3] History of the Church, 4:269.
[4] See Journal History of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints, 28 Feb. 1850, 1–2.
[5] See J. Lister, “ On a New Method of Treating Compound Fracture, Abscess, Etc., with Observations on the Conditions of Suppuration,” Lancet, 1
(1867):326.
[6] See J. Y. Simpson, “Our Existing System of Hospitalism and Its Effects,” Edinburgh Med. Journal, 14 (1869):817.
[7] See L. A. Stimson, “Bacteria and Their Influence upon the Origin and Development of Septic Complications of Wounds,” New York Med. Journal, 22
(1875):144.
[8] See Edward Cook, The Life of Florence Nightingale, 2 vols. (1913), 1:352–438.
[9] See Ignaz Philipp Semmelweiss, Die Aetiologie, der Begriff und die Prophylaxis des Kindbettfiebers, reprinted from 1861 ed. (1966), 102–13.
[10] See Isolation Techniques for use in Hospitals (National Communicable Disease Center, 1970), 9.
[11] See United Nations World Population Prospects: 2006 revision—Table II.1,p.9.
[12] See David P. Goldman, “Demographics & Depression,” First Things (May 2009), 24.
[13] Ibid.
[14] See T. S. Eliot, “Choruses from ‘The Rock,’” The Complete Poems and Plays (1971), 96.

Taking time.

2010-01-25T23:15:00.003-05:00

I miss you, friend.

And to those who don't know what I'm referring to, that's okay. I just wanted to put it out there that I miss you.

AFC CHAMPS!!!

2010-01-24T18:51:00.001-05:00

Our Colts pulled out the win (and I'll be honest, that first half made me nervous!) so it's Superbowl time!!!!!

I wish I was in Indianapolis today. I bet it's NUTS.

♥ Peyton Manning and the boys. And shout out to Garcon and Collie who showed those Jets that ALL of our receivers are good, not just Dallas Clark and Reggie Wayne.

Pink and Purple

2010-01-24T00:55:00.001-05:00

According to fashion magazines, purple is the new pink. Good thing I love both!

And I've started to really enjoy having my fingernails painted. Normally, not my style. Lately, very much enjoyable. It makes me feel girly and pretty.

Oh, and the Colts play the Jets tomorrow. I CAN'T WAIT! And I'm being a good girl and missing part of the game to do church stuff (God first, then football) but I'm not kidding when I say that if the Jets even come CLOSE to beating us tomorrow, I will have words. I have faith in my team though. I don't think they're going to let us down. There aren't a lot of NFL watchers here at school. It's really quite sad. Not to mention I'm a girl and I talk about Colts football like I would talk about shoes or clothes. Meh. Such is life. :)

I just thought you'd enjoy that randomness for the day.

xoxo. Court

Homework Machine

2010-01-22T01:32:00.001-05:00

Okay, so my last post was about homework as well, but it just feels so good to get so much done! I can't believe I got everything done today that I needed to and it's not even midnight!! I even got in an hour of working out (well, to be honest, I went to a hip hop dance class, and I barely broke a sweat-- a tad disappointed). Tomorrow it's over to Idaho Falls to hopefully (PLEASE PRAY!) find a j.o.b! I am in desperate need of one...my savings account is dwindling....and this is the first time in a long time I've actually HAD a savings account, so I really don't wanna ruin that.

Okay lovies, I'm off to dreamland :)

♥ Court

Ugh.

2010-01-21T01:07:00.003-05:00

Homework consumes my LIFE.

On the flip side, I am back into the groove of my fitness routine. :) Ah...I feel better already!

And I have revamped and started keeping up my nutrition and recipe blog. Please stop by and tell your friends about it!! www.naturallygoodbycourtney.blogspot.com/

Let's all make 2010 a year we improve our bodies physically, mentally and spiritually!

MWAH. ♥

Yes, I was burned but I call it a lesson learned.

2010-01-18T17:51:00.004-05:00

Oh Alicia Keys, how you have a way with words.

Yes, it's a new decade and year, but moreso I can tell you that I have entered into a new phase of my life. It kind of sneaks up you over time. You start to notice things and make small changes and then WHAM, you realize that it is time to move on and make a change (I seriously have a buffet of song lyrics for the emotions and experiences in my life).

For as long as I can remember, I have been a people pleaser. Now, for my fellow people pleasers, you can attest to the effort and heartache that often follows when you spend so much time and energy on making everyone else happy, only at the end of the day you feel empty inside and often a bit cheated because most of the people in your life are ones who rarely put as much effort into their relationships with you as you do with them. I don't always enjoy, well actually I rarely enjoy, putting my heart out there for the world to see but as I was reading some old journal entries today, I saw something happen. I saw a change.

I would like to share a couple of excerpts from past journal entries:

Aug 13, 2009

"If there is something I can pass on it's that life is hard, but in the end, life is beautiful. I don't always remember that myself, but there is so much beauty in this world. Never take it for granted. Flaws and experiences are what make us...and I believe that is why we are allowed to experience them. We do a great injustice to ourselves if we feel that life should be perfect or that we can be perfect. We must learn to rely on the Lord each and every day. I'm still learning this concept. And I still have so much more to learn. But it is through endurance that we find the strength to get through it all. The Lord will never leave us alone. I am so grateful for that."

Aug 24, 2009

I keep having this vision....and I've been having it for quite some time now. I live in a one story house, and I can see myself working out in the yard. It's a nice house and it has dark cherry cabinets and stainless steel appliances in the kitchen. I'm independently wealthy and I am making food for myself. My house is very well decorated and quiet. I have a private voice studio in the front room and a grand piano. I am a successful performer and live in a quiet neighborhood in a valley somewhere...or maybe even back in Indianapolis. But I feel like it's out west somewhere. Maybe California even? I'm in very good shape, and very happy. But alone. I am very involved in volunteering with kids and other programs and have dinner parties and such at my house for my close friends often. Is it weird that this is what I see? I honestly feel like I am at a point where I don't think I'm going to find someone. I know I'm only 25...and that's not really old at all....but for me, I need to find contentment on my own. Maybe that's what this vision is all about. I need to find happiness through service and doing what I love. It gets harder and harder to be rejected and ignored. So maybe I'll just stop putting myself in those positions. The hardest part of that will be the fact that I have lived my life at someone else's sake, if that makes sense. My actions are often dictated by other's plans. So as I work on this aspect of myself, hopefully I can find joy in doing some of my own things."

And I do feel that this song sums up some of how I felt about life....

I wanted to share that with you because I am really excited about what life has to offer me. I am finally starting to see life just as it is each day and I don't make assumptions about the future or feel that it is my responsibility to always give my two cents about every situation. We are who we are, and we will do what we do. I'm still working on this new phase, and I'm sure it will move on and evolve into another new phase eventually, but I guess what it boils down to is this. This is my time. It's not about someone else anymore.
I have always had someone, namely some guy, who I was ready to give my heart to on a moment's notice without even really thinking if it was best for either of us. I was too concerned with that to be concerned with myself and to really just put my head up and focus on what I can do to better myself and be happy. I no longer think that I need someone else to complete me. I simply want someone to share myself with, but what is even more important is I finally figured out that I am valuable and worth a little bit of a effort. Heck, I'm worth more than a little bit of effort. I am so blessed with a loving family and a handful of friends who lift me up and I only hope I do the same for them. I want to be self sufficient so that I can help others.

Being back at school can certainly present its share of challenges. Everyone on this campus, although we are all here for our education, seems to be concerned with dating and marriage. Over 30% of the student body is married (mind you, this university is all undergraduates and the average age of males is 22 and the average age of females is 20-21). Being 25, single, and not really an active dater isn't the ideal situation. However, if I can be happy here, despite that, I can be happy anywhere!

John Mayer is my music soulmate if I ever had one. He writes the most amazing songs...and this one right now could sum up how I feel...

Enjoy :)

I ♥ you all. May you find love and the things in life that make you truly happy!

2010 -- A new decade!

2010-01-01T21:11:00.002-05:00

Ten years ago, my life revolved around choir, music, boys and learning. Now? Ten years later? Would you believe me if I told you it's still about the same? I guess anytime we're single, in school, and still pursuing the same things in life, consistency will exist.

What a decade is has been. What a YEAR 2009 was and I only hope 2010 will bring laughter, love and hope.

Let's recap some exciting things in the last decade:

2002 - Joined the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints
2002 - Graduated Ben Davis High School
2003 - Studied at Indiana University as a vocal performance major
2004 - Got my own place and a DOG! :)
2004 - Auditioned for American Idol
2005 - Got my first promotion
2006 - Managed my first property
2008 - Was accepted to Brigham Young University - Idaho

For some reason, I can't think of anything major in 2007. Maybe that was an off year? haha

2009 has been a great year for me. So many things have happened -- good and bad. I started off the year at BYUI in Rexburg, Idaho. Who would have ever thought I'd be attending a Mormon University in Idaho? It was the first time away from Indiana and friends and family I have had all of my life. It had ups and downs, but I finished out the year with a 3.3 GPA and some of the most amazing friends a girl could ask for.

I also turned 25 in 2009. What an age. Twenty-five is that age where you decide who you're really going to be and become more comfortable in your own skin, I think. At least that is how it has been for me. I have learned to accept my flaws (while still working on them, of course) and loving myself more each day. I'm officially on the downward slope to 30. EW. I'll be 15 in my heart forever if I have anything to do with it.

2009 also brought some challenges with failed relationships and some bitter tastes in my mouth but I have learned and progressed past them. I am stronger and more aware now.

Two very important spiritual milestones happened in 2009 as well. I received my temple endowments, and then was able to perform, by proxy, the temple endowment for my mother as well. I cannot begin to describe the peace that came over me from this experience. I know that families are eternal. That's all I can say.

The last half of my year was spent in Logan, Utah. Logan has proved to be a place where I have learned a lot about myself...and also a place where patience has become my friend and no longer an enemy. I feel that one of my greatest accomplishments this year was beginning to develop a greater sense of patience with life. I have learned to take each day as it comes. I've stopped planning my life years in advance. I've started looking a little bit inward to ensure that I am able to take care of myself first, so that I can better care for others when they are in need. I have stepped back and allowed myself to feel lonliness and sorrow in a way that has helped me grow. I have learned that you can only worry about what you have control over. The rest, or whatever is out of your control, is up to God....and your faith in Him should make up for any worries you might have about what is out of your control.

And over the past week, upon my return home to Indiana, I learned that my family is and always be the most important part of my life. Friends come and go, but family stands the test of time. They take you in whatever part of life you're in. Going home made me remember who I am and where I came from...which although I learned a lot about myself being away from home, it was going home where I was able to feel complete in the learning process. I saw the people who I loved the most, and who loved me. I had such a wonderful time. I have such a fantastic support group and I am so grateful for that.

It goes without saying that I have some goals for 2010. One major goal is to finish and hit my goal weight. Over the last 2 years I have slowly lost about 50 lbs. Well now, it's time to shed the rest. I return to Rexburg tomorrow and my goal for school is to simply do my best. I, unfortuantely, have always been someone who "got by" in school because I never really put forth 100% of what I could. So this year, I want to do my best and see if I can acheive greater results because of it. If I can get all A's and B's with minimal effort....why can't I get straight A's with a little more effort? Other goals include maintaining a savings account and being more financially prepared for emergencies. I also would like to put a large dent in my geneology and temple work.
I would like to visit Yellowstone National Park, and I would like to teach my own fitness class. I would also like to sing the National Anthem at a professional sporting event this year. Anybody know how I could do that for the Colts!? haha.

So, here is to a new year. A new decade. I'll be in my mid-thirties the next time a new decade rolls around. In ten years, I hope to have my education completed, have a house to call my own somewhere, be healthy and living the life God wants me to live.

Happy New Year!

The Secret

2009-10-23T17:36:00.002-04:00

Today as I was setting up the banquet room for an event this evening a little old man walks in and greets me. He asked me if I had a table I could help him set up for a display. He showed me the pictures that we was wishing to display and the first set of pictures were some very old wedding photos. Unbeknownst to me, I admired the photos and he thanked me. Then he admitted that those photos were him and his wife....50 years ago.

I'm not quite sure I had the reaction I did, but I immediately felt all warm and fuzzy inside, almost to the point of tears and congratulated him on his anniversary. He's just this little old man, all wrinkled and adorable, with his fading but still present dutch accent. He has worked for the air force in computers for most of his life and it is apparent that he has done many great things.

So, naturally, I asked him -- "So, what's your secret?"

He answered, " Well, you really know how much you love someone after you're retired." I agreed with him. I mean, your kids are gone, and neither of you are working. So you're stuck together again...only this time after years of things to keep you busy. We went on to discuss how that arrangement works out for him and his lovely wife. Then he told me, "The most important thing we give each other is plenty of space. If she wants to go somewhere, or do something, I let her do it and she does the same for me. I love my wife more now that I did 50 years ago."

Again....thank you, little old man, for putting me on the verge of waterworks. I was truly touched. I have watched a lot of failed marriages and it is so refreshing to see one that has made it. His name is Henny. I'm excited to see all of the people show up for their big celebration tonight. A 50th wedding anniversary is nothing to snuff at. I can only imagine how much hard work has gone into their marriage. I am so glad I met Henny today. It definitely gave me time to reflect on my own desires. But I think he gave fantastic advice. It's about support and love. It doesn't have to be a life where you're on top of each other. It's a team effort to get through life together. That's really all it is...and you have to love them and put their desires before your own. When he said space was what is the secret, what I realized is that by allowing someone space and time, in many ways you are being selfless. Most often times, our selfishness gets in the way of our relationships with people. So I am glad I met Henny. He brightened my day (that could also attribute to the fact when I told him I was not married his reply was "A beautiful girl like you is not married? How is that so?" .....). He made me remember who I am and who I want to be. Also, he helped me remember what I'm searching for. In this world, it is easy to get caught up in being snide or sarcastic. It is most definitely in my nature to tear others down with a quick witted side comment -- but as I've grown up I've realized that I what I want to be known for is something different than that. One day, while talking to Anthony (many of you will remember who I mean but for those who don't -- Anthony was my very first love and boyfriend. We reunited about 3 years after HS and remained very close friends after that. He wanted to get back together and I always refused him because of his lifestyle choices....He died last November of an overdose) on the phone, I asked him why, even though we are so different, he would want to be with me? His reply "because you're the sweetest girl I've ever known. You would do anything for anybody and you are genuine." Now, I don't know if I agree with him, but let me tell you that that thought has stuck with me for a long time now...and I strive for that. I want to be the sweetest girl, not the meanest girl or the most sarcastic girl. It takes time, but I'm starting to realize that love is the beginning and the end. It's not attraction that keeps a marriage going, or money, or material, shallow things, it's love and time and trust and selflessness.

Congrats on 50 years, Henny!

Jamming out.

2009-10-19T02:02:00.002-04:00

Hello loves.

So let me tell you that I am loving this fall season. I drive through the Logan Canyon every weekend to go to work and it is SO beautiful!

So how was your Sunday? Mine was excellent...all except one teeny tiny, um, incident.

There I was, minding my own business, feeling all cute in my gray skirt and black stiletto boots. I get up to go sing with the choir, the front of my boot slips off the front of the step and BAM. I totally biffed it in front of my entire ward. I quickly got up, turned around, did a couple of curtsies to admit it was quite embarrassing but I've done worse and proceed to sing. All is well, minus my jammed finger and ego.

On a great note however, I made some fab tortilla soup tonight and it is a VERY simple recipe so why not share with you all?

Boil some chicken stock, add a palmful of cumin and a palmful of paprika, a little pepper and salt, a couple of bay leaves and pico de gallo. Grill or saute a chicken breast in olive oil. Dish up soup, add cut up chicken strips to soup, add a palmful or so of your favorite mexican cheese (or cheddar or mozz), top with tortilla strips and ole! Mexican heaven in your mouth! Enjoy :)

I am so excited...

2009-10-14T01:18:00.001-04:00

for Halloween!!! I just wanted you to know.

Working harrrrd for the money!

2009-10-11T23:31:00.002-04:00

Well hello! Sorry 'bout my little fit earlier. Sometimes a girl just has to rant.

Anywhiz.

So, my weeks pretty much consist of one thing. Work. I enjoy my job, don't get me wrong, but man oh man...I'm a tired girl on Sundays. On Saturdays I have been working doubles at Cafe Sabor in Bear Lake in addition to the regular crazy busy schedule I work at Hamilton's during the week. It's about an hour drive through a gorgeous (and very curvy!) canyon but I always make really good money there so, to me, toootttally worth the drive. Not to mention, Justin lets me drive the company's 4'runner up there so I don't have to put extra miles on my car or use my gas money :) Gotta love having a boss who's on your side.

The only downfall to all this work is my lack of a social life and lack of energy to have an "after work" social life. I am normally pretty spent after running around on my feet for 10 or so hours. I love doing it, so I really don't mind, but it makes life outside of work a little less than entertaining. Luckily, when I come home I'm not all by myself so I haven't turned into a total isolated being. The money has been nice, and very helpful! I am happy (and embarrassed) to report that I am driving with a valid driver's lisence, plates, and insurance. It always seemed one or the other was missing in the equation. Although don't get me started on how I feel about paying $90/month on insurance. Ugh.

So needless to say trying to hang out and meet people, let alone go on dates, has presented itself with a challenge! But I'm happy to report that I have managed to find a date that is just as busy as I am and we both have Monday nights free! hahah. How about a little FHE dating action? Oh yeah....well, a girl's gotta do what a girl's gotta do, right!? I made a goal for myself to go on at least one date a month -- nothing major, just something casual -- so I can meet some people and maybe one day snag up some stellar dude to bring home to my daddy. I've met some great guys so I figure, why not? I'm at a point in my life right now where something serious might be too complicated for me, but I think I need the experience of casual dating. So, it should be fun. :)

Tomorrow should be an exciting day. For starters, I have the day off. HOLLERRR. But in addition to that, I am going to expand my horizons and yes, wait for it..................................I'm going to learn how to change my own oil. Nice, right!? I think girls should know how to do that. I enjoy being handy and having additional knowledge so I'm pretty stoked. Charlie is being a gentlemen and helping a girl out with my first time. Wait, er, um, I mean....yeah that didn't sound so good. haha! You know what I'm trying to say! Get your mind outta the gutter!

Life is pretty good, folks. I can't complain. I hope life is treating you well also.

Oh, and since it's fast and testimony Sunday, allow me to share.

If there is one thing I want you all to remember me by it is the fact that I know God is who He says He is. I know He is our Father in Heaven and He stands as the Supreme Being and God of this universe. I know He is a loving and almighty man, who lives, and knows each of us by name and situation and status. He sent us His only begotten Son, even Jesus Christ, to this earth to walk and talk among men. And Christ came here to minister unto us and to all people to show them the way back to our Father in Heaven. He made the ultimate sacrifice and was crucified on a cross for our sins, our pain, our sorrows, our heartaches. He bled from every pore for each of us. I know that Christ established a church, one church, that taught the fullness of His gospel and message. I know that although at one time lost due to the iniquity of man, we are now in the fullness of times, the last dispensation before the return of our Savior. Jesus Christ re-established His church again on the earth and He did this through a prophet, Joseph Smith Jr. Joseph Smith did have a vision. He saw Heavenly Father and Jesus Christ. He was given the keys and authority to restore the gospel of Christ back into it's glory and fullness so that we might prepare the Earth for Christ's return once again to rule. I know that His church is the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter Day Saints. It is through His living Church we have the answers to some of life's most difficult questions. I know these things are true by the power of the Holy Ghost. I have felt it's power and I have received a witness of these things. I love my Savior and I love my Father in Heaven. I pray for their mercy and forgiveness of my mortal mistakes and am eternally grateful for the sacrifice of a perfect man on my behalf to make me whole.

I leave that testimony with you in the name of my Savior, Jesus Christ. Amen.

Hmph.

2009-10-08T02:32:00.002-04:00

I am most certainly in a moody fit at the moment. Yesterday I went to Wal-mart and bought stuff to make chocolate chip cookies. True to my own form, of course I bought organic all purpose naturally white flour (it's not bleached and it way better for you) along with natural cane sugar instead of refined table sugar. I use sea salt instead of iodized table salt, etc. I use those ingredients because they are REAL things and haven't been processed with a million chemicals to make them cheaper by the dozen. I was so excited to make chocolate chip cookies tonight. I haven't baked in such a long time. Charlie's favorite is oatmeal chocolate chip, but I didn't make the cookies for him, I made them for everyone so I thought I'd go with good ol' fashioned chocolate chip. I use nuts in my cookies because walnuts have a lot of mono-unsaturated fats which is good for the body and helps the sugar that is in the cookies to be absorbed at a slower rate, therefore, a nutritional boost if you will. I assure you, these cookies do not taste like cardboard. No where close in fact. They were perfectly baked, and tasted great! I like to make food for people, but in this household, my food isn't really appreciated. Charlie was going to take some cookies home and as soon as he saw the walnuts he decided he didn't want any. You can barely taste them!! Then he told me that "real" chocolate chip cookies aren't made with nuts. I never cook for any of them because they have the pallette of people who have never eaten anything other than burgers and fries their whole lives. And in their cases, mexican food too. It just frustrates me so much! I was really looking forward to baking cookies...and part of the fun is sharing them with others. Is is weird that I'm so upset about it? I know I'm probably totally over-reacting but it is just one of those things that gets under my skin. It didn't help that I had a crappy night at work tonight either. I'm just having one of those days I guess. I was fine all day, but work really pissed me off. Ugh. I miss having people in my life who appreciate a nice gesture.

Yes, yes I know...I'm a slacker!

2009-10-07T01:40:00.003-04:00

Moving out west has done nothing for my blogging adventures, that is for sure!

Well, of course there has been 1.394838483 million things that have happened since I wrote a couple of months ago. I can't believe I let two months go by! Yikes!

Anyhooooodle. To catch you up on where in the world is Courtney Rosemeyer -- I am still in Logan, Utah. Annnnddd....It looks as if I'm here for the long haul. Now, before you get all concerned, I'm NOT quitting school. I'm transferring to Utah State next fall and in the meantime can take my generals from BYU-Idaho online. See? I can do things and still accomplish the major goal at hand. Why am I staying in Logan, you ask? I haven't the foggiest idea, other than to tell you that I feel this is where I need to be for one reason or another. So, I'm an official "utard" as we called them in Indiana. I have Utah plates and driver license now. Yikes. Oh, and two traffic tickets to boot. Dang Utah cops. Maybe living here will make me a more careful driver?? Hm. We'll see.

BUT one thing Utah has done to me....and don't ask me why...I am starting to like country music. Okay, I did like country back in the day. And when I say back in the day I mean as in 9th grade. Trisha Yearwood and the Dixie Chicks were rockin. But I've never been an actual country fan until now. My heart still belongs to the hip hop beats though. With that thought, I have to promote this country band, Lady Antebellum. I'm obsessed with them. I'm obsessed in particular with this song.....

Lyrics ::::::

I know that the bridges that I've burned along the way
Have left me with these walls and these scars that won't go away
And opening up has always been the hardest thing
Until you came

So lay here beside me, just hold me and don't let go
This feeling I'm feeling is something I've never known
And I just can't take my eyes off you
And I just can't take my eyes off you

I love when you tell me that I'm pretty when I just wake up
And I love how you tease me when I'm moody, but it's never too much.
I'm falling fast, but the truth is I'm not scared at all
You climbed my wall

So lay here beside me, just hold me and don't let go
This feeling I'm feeling is something I've never known
And I just can't take my eyes off you
And I just can't take my eyes off you, off you, off you

So lay here beside me, just hold me and don't let go
Oh, this feeling I'm feeling is something I've never known
And I just can't take my eyes off you
And I just can't take my eyes off you

------------------

Gorgeous, right!? Ah, I can't stop listening to it. I wouldn't mind dancing to this song on my fictitious wedding day.

So, what am I doing with my time here in Utah? Well, work is what consumes a majority of it. I'm still working at Hamilton's Steakhouse and I've also been helping out at Cafe Sabor up at Bear Lake. It's the other restaurant that Justin has. It's mexican and soooo good. And not good for me that I have access to unlimited chips and salsa when I'm there. So working....yeah it keeps me busy. That, and late night trips to Wal-mart. My only complaints about Logan are these: 1. Lack of the Tar-jay (Target). I miss you Target. Why must you be an hour away? 2. No Secrets to be found anywhere. Where the hay am I supposed to buy bras if there is no Victoria's Secret? What kind of mall is Cache Valley Mall anyways!? hah. Target was my backup bra buying store. And now, nothing! I've tried wally world...and they aren't doing me good. So I'm on the hunt for a good bra store.

OH! So good news is that I've lost roughly 10 lbs since moving down here. Crazy, huh? I love it. Total weight loss so far since my journey began has been almost 60 lbs. I've lost 20ish since I left Indiana. So weird to think I used to be that big. But I'm not done yet. It's a slow and steady process....but I will reach my goal weight. Just you...weight. HA!

Now, I know the question you're all dying to ask. And no, I'm not dating anyone. I've gone on some random dates here and there but nothing serious. One day my prince will show up, or realize what he has in front of his face. In the meantime, I'm just hangin out.

And a sidenote to this topic-- I went to a soccer game today and was listening to these moms and such....and can I just say that I can't wait to have kids. I have no choice but to wait, but still, my kids will be athletes if I have any say in the matter. They will play any and every sport. The girls will dance. The boys will too. Haha. I have no problem with being a soccer mom someday (or football or baseball -- I doubt I'll have any kids playing basketball...unless I marry a very tall man) . As a matter of fact, I think I am looking forward to it. BUT I'm enjoying the fact that I can sleep as long as I want, do what I want and answer to myself and God right now. I need to take advantage of that while it's here, because one day I'm sure it will be gone.

I'm still working on getting a job substitute teaching here in Cache Valley. I think it would be so much fun! I'm still debating on changing my major to Music Education...or elementary ed. Ugh. We'll worry about that later though. In the meantime, I just need to take some general classes and get them out of the way.

So, that's been my life! Sounds exciting, huh? How have you been? :) I will try to be better about posting!!

Shout out.

2009-08-17T22:10:00.002-04:00

Thanks for always reading my blog Vandi. I pretty much just write for you :) hehe. I can always count on comments from you.

Como say whaaa?

2009-08-15T00:46:00.003-04:00

So despite my last journal entry, I am feelin dang good right now. Perhaps it's my new haircut? I always feel great after a good hair appointment. I feel like me :) It's a sassy little do with some new color too!! (says the poet who didn't know it!). I put some red and reallly dark brown highlights and low lights in my hair. I love it. Thanks Joe! (I scored a gift card worth $87 for $30...can't beat that!)

So a lot of interesting things have been happening. Let me tell you about the exciting life I currently lead. Today consisted of the following: I got up at noon. I played guitar hero for almost 3 hours with Michelle. I got ready for work and went to work.

What a life right?! Well, I'll love it while it lasts because come Monday, I'm cracking the whip and my new schedule at work starts. Although I have had the WORST luck with jobs....especially restaurants. Do you remember Bertolini's? It was this fantastic Italian place in Circle Center Mall (downtown Indy) and I loved it there. I worked about 30 hours a week and made about 300-400/week in tips. And then I went to work one day and BAM -- CLOSED. I was so sad. So here I am...starting at this great place in Logan and what do I find out? Oh, yep, they're closing at the end of this month. UGH! What the heck?! My dad told me I'm going to get a reputation as being a restaurant killer. The economy is effecting the industry big time....but I guess I'll keep trying.

BUT I had an epiphany a couple of days ago and I'm finally feeling so good about life now. A few things came to my mind....

One: Honestly, I get really lonely sometimes...but it's okay. I won't be lonely forever. I have faith in that. I just gotta keep working on getting the kinks out in my own life.

Two: I'm about 99.9% sure I'm changing my major to Music Education. Originally I thought maybe just changing it to education was the way to go because Music Ed was going to be harder...but I've taken the easy way out way too many times. When I think about what I want to do with the rest of my life, it always involves working with kids. So why am I NOT majoring in anything to do with kids? So, there ya go. I can be a professional singer without a bachelor's degree. And I certainly do NOT want to be an opera singer...although it is pretty fun to hit those high notes! I toyed with the idea of staying here in Logan and transferring to Utah State to finish my degree. But no, I need to be in Rexburg. It is the best place for me for a lot of reasons.

Three: With number two finally figured out, I'm going to **hopefully** get a job substitute teaching this fall while I'm here in Logan. It's not hard to do and it doesn't pay super well....but it still pays decent and it gives me some experience in the education field.

Four: Good guys still exist. I was starting to worry for a while that all was left was a world full of guys who had the depth of the kiddie pool but I'm happy to report that there are some good ones left....and one of them happens to be newly single again. I'm not saying that I'm going to jump on that too soon, or that I'm going to "jump on it" at all (I should really watch my catch phrases to make sure they aren't literal) but this particular guy intrigues me. He keeps my interest. He always has something interesting or insightful to say. He is incredibly talented. He is sweet and has a smile that could light up a room. And he's honest. Obviously, it's safe to say I like him...and I don't normally divulge such information on my blog, but I'm pretty sure he doesn't even know that I keep a blog, let alone read it! Anyways.....even if he does.....more than anything, even if nothing ever develops between us, it is refreshing to know that good men exist.

See? Haven't I been a busy girl? Well, at least my mind has been busy! But it's great. The mountains are beautiful. I saw like six shooting stars during the meteor shower a couple of nights ago and I finally got a little fan the hmmmms instead of my dumb ceiling fan that drives me nuts.

Pictures of new hair to come! :) ♥ MWAH.

Yes...it's 4:35am.

2009-08-12T06:35:00.002-04:00

Sleep just hasn't been a part of my life lately. I'm sure it still has something to do with the fact that I sleep on an air mattress and have lots going down in my spinny little head. So, please humor me. If I make a spelling or grammar error -- deal. :)

I moved to Logan, UT about three weeks ago while I'm off track. I come down here to visit all the time anyways. I'm crashing with some friends who are practically family and working.

Things haven't gone as I expected per se...but then again, when do things really go the way I expect them to?! HA! Never. Anywho...I do love Logan. It's a great town. I also dig the weather right now. No humidity, it hardly ever rains, and it's sunny and warm.

So, hear me out. A few months ago I turned 25 right? Yep. I did. I feel as if I've come to the conclusion that I might be suffering through a quarter life crisis. I don't like the fact that I'm getting older...and moreso that I feel like I'm behind somehow. I have no husband, no kids, no degree...but does that define success in our lives? What defines if we're "where we are supposed to be"? I do have a lot of experiences and mistakes to contribute. Ha. But you know how in kindergarden they determine whether or not you're "where you're supposed to be" before they advance you on to first grade -- well, what is it for 25? And if I'm not there yet, can I stay 25 until I meet the requirments?

I know I'm probably looking at this all wrong but what can I say? It's just how I feel. I'm trying to figure out where my life is going...and getting older isn't fairing well with me at the moment. I'm trying to embrace life and blah blah blah and some days are better than others. I have no reason to complain about my life. I'm not living on the streets and I have food to eat. I'm extremely blessed with great people in my life and have been given all the talents a girl could ask for....but I feel like something is missing. I feel like I'm not being what I was brought here to be. I've been trying to figure this stuff out for a while now (in case you didn't already gather that).

Tonight I was making dinner for myself, home alone, listening to Jazz music and I was perfectly content. Right now I'm awake, exhausted, itchy (don't know why...random) and frustrated because I can't sleep. I hate this air mattress. It's not comfortable at all...and my fan makes noise and keeps me awake. I like the normal low hummmmmm of a fan, but this is a ceiling fan...and it's loose a little bit...and it makes obnoxious noises! LOL.

So perhaps I'm done complaining. :) Sorry you have to listen to me rant about such retarded things.

Sheryl Crow said it best...

2009-07-20T15:16:00.000-04:00

A change will do you good.

Feliz Cumpleanos Estados Unidos!

2009-07-06T15:01:00.002-04:00

I know, irony that I wrote Happy Birthday America in Spanish!? I thought it was funny :)

Anywhoooo.....

Can I just say how lame I am that I never keep up with this blog. In my defense, I'm WAY better than I was when I first moved here, but nonetheless, it's still a good chunk of time in between posts.

So this weekend we celebrated our independence and the birth of our fine nation. Well, okay, maybe right now our nation isn't so fine, but still, I live in a bubble most of the time and never watch the news. Ah, ignorance is bliss.

I went down to one of my favorite places for the little holiday -- Logan, Utah. It was nice to get away from Rexburg for a bit and to forget that I go to school and that I am stressed out about 493.3938 things right now going on in my life. I stayed at the oh-so-hospitable Joe's house again and had a great time hanging out. I wish I had more pictures to show but unfortunately I didn't take a lot of pictures this weekend. Again, one of my many blogging imperfections. Blogs can be boring without pictures. Facebook has lots though...so just go there for pictures. :)

I came back this weekend feeling different from when I left though. Very strange how that works. We'll see if and how long these new feelings last, but I realized that life is here to live and enjoy -- and that I need to relax and enjoy life more. My mind was in a strange place this weekend and I'm still not exactly sure where or how it ended up there. But I've come to some self realizations this weekend. I spent the weekend with Joe and Charlie and their family. I didn't do what I set out to do this weekend -- well not all of it at least. It just goes to show me that I need to stop expecting so much and go with it more. Charlie is a very go with the flow type of guy....and I admire that about him. I'm terrible at that. I always make these "plans" in my head....and they never turn out the way I want them to. So maybe I should stop planning so much and starting living life how it's going and loving that a little more?! Not sure if any of this made sense to you...but that's how I roll, I guess.

The mountains were beautiful and the weather was really great all weekend. Happy Birthday America.

Crick or creek?

2009-06-14T23:59:00.002-04:00

Okay, so the title has absolutely nothing to do with the topic other than the fact I took a nap earlier today, slept wrong, and have had the worst crick in my neck ever sense. Advil and a heating pad are my two favorite friends right now. (Except it is one of those stick on heating pads, and well, it's not doing a very good job of sticking. So now I'm getting a worse crick in my neck from sitting with my head stiff so the heating pad doesn't come unstuck. Really, could life get more complicated?!)

This week was a good week! I'll tell you why. Pay attention....

I started each day off with scripture reading and a prayer. AND I got up at 6:15a. Shocked, I know. Me? A morning person? Surely not! But I am telling you I have been trying it and I like it! I miss sleep sometimes, and still love naptime, but all in all, it's been such a great blessing for me. I just need to work on going to bed a little earlier.

I don't have anything particularly interesting to share with you. I went to a really great fireside tonight that helped me gain a little more appreciation of my self worth and the worth of those around me. We all have divine potential. But what really hit home is that being healthy and simple and clean is what is most important. As I have grown closer to God I have really come to love simplicity. I have come to find peace in the simple things. I still have big dreams, but they involve traveling to other countries and teaching children about being creators. Teaching them how to create by using music, books, art, and food and tapping into their imaginations. I think as adults we sometimes lose that passion inside of us to create something. I have two great clips I want you to watch. One is about creating...the other about distorted body images. Somehow, to me, they tie in together. We don't need to be perfect to be beautiful. We can create without those things.

This clip is excerpts from a talk given at a General Relief Society Broadcast given two years ago. I loved this talk. Creating is what makes me feel alive. The music behind this video is inspiring! Enjoy! If you ever need a pick me up or some inspiration, I recommend this video!

Crazy huh? Man...imagine how hot I could look with professional makeup artists and some photo shop!

Good night all :)

Spread the word!

2009-06-10T15:30:00.001-04:00

Sleepyhead.

2009-06-05T16:22:00.001-04:00

I'm tired. And a bit grouchy.

That's all.

♥ Courtney

Oh -- and check out my other blog!

naturallygoodbycourtney.blogspot.com

A time for writing and a time for......other stuff.

2009-06-02T15:32:00.002-04:00

Oh blog, can I tell you something. This semester?? It's kicking my butt. And not in a good way...because my butt doesn't look any better than it did before.

Here's what I do know though -- I ain't gon' give up. (Don't worry Dad.)

I don't have any baby pictures to post, as I do not have a baby.

I do not have any other pictures to post because I keep forgetting and/or losing my camera at those moments in my life where a camera would be nice. So you'll have to use your imaginations as I do my best to depict my life in word form.

I went to Salt Lake City over Memorial Day weekend! I can now call myself a real mormon. I have seen mecca. :) We took an "official" tour of Temple Square and I must say, I was more than impressed by the pioneers. They were crafty people!! Not only did they build a breath taking building such as the SLC Temple, they built the Tabernacle with some of the most amazing acoustics I've ever heard. I wanted to jump on that stage and sing so bad I could barely restrain myself. I also just found the whole idea of the tours so cool. If I wasn't a member of the LDS Church already, I would definitely be more interested in the Church afterwards.

The only creepy thing was the lady at the end of the tour who was taking pictures in front of the Christus statue. It wasn't creepy that she was taking pictures -- but it was creepy that she was posing on the floor, whilst several months pregnant, whilst wearing a tube top and skirt as to expose her very pregnant stomach. I think pregnant woman are beautiful, don't get me wrong, but that just creeped me out. I was feeling all spiritual after listening to the little message and pondering as I looked at the statue of Christ then BAM! Pregnant woman shows up....not. cool.

The longer I live out west, the more I am growing to love it. The landscapes are amazing. Mountains are awe inspiring to me. I've gone down to Logan, Utah a few times now and everytime I go I love it more and more. We went on a drive through the Logan Canyon and it was so beautiful!!! I'm thinking more and more about doing my masters at Utah State (which is in Logan). I've also discovered that I enjoy rural life much more than urban life. I feel more at peace. For any of you that have known me long enough to experience me when I'm struggling with panic attacks, you know that driving has always been one of my biggest problems. There was a time where I would have panic attacks just driving to work that was a mere 10 minutes away! Now, I can drive to Utah, all by myself, in perfect peace :) I think it is because I never have to deal with heavy traffic and I have beautiful landscapes to look at. It just makes me happy :) I actually really enjoy going on a nice drive nowadays.

Hmm....let's see, what else?

I made lasagna for the first time -- it turned out really well!! I did my normal Courtney spin on it and made things a bit healthier by using ground turkey instead of ground beef and switched regular lasagna noodles for whole wheat noodles. I also used organic canned diced tomatoes instead of processed spaghetti or tomato sauce. I was really happy with how it turned out! I want my own cooking show! If I posted my dishes and recipes on a blog, would you guys actually try them??

Also, a new trick for making homemade garlic bread : Cut your favorite loaf of bread to open it up (we used french bread, but you could use italian or even a whole grain roll). With a slightly softened stick of butter add dried basil and parsley (substantial amounts of both) as well as a about 3 or 4 Tbls of garlic powder to the butter. Then whip the butter with electric beaters until all is combined and butter is fluffy so it's easier to spread. Spread it on the bread and bake at about 400 degrees until bread is crispy and butter is melted!! YUMMY!

Welp....I think I've given you enough for today. :) Hope you're all doing well and loving life!

♥ Courtney